spelling 101

Kiril arrived at 9:05 a.m., ready and willing to do whatever it took to get us to Kiev.
He was a great kid. And by kid...I mean kid. He was barely 21.
But he spoke great English and he talked to me.
A big improvement, I must say.
Turns out, Kiril had spent a year in the U.S. as an exchange student, and he had such a great experience and grew to love the country so much he wants to immigrate here soon.
I hope he's able to follow that dream.
We spent the morning showing Kiril around Odessa. We showed him the opera house, the steps, the pier. He loved it all. He was like a little kid walking around and taking everything in.
But he was also a huge help and above all, he was patient with Maddie.
He walked at her pace, helped me help her up and down stairs and translated what he thought she was saying to me.
It was so nice to finally be able to communicate with her without using signs...even if it was only for a few hours.
We stopped by McDonald's for lunch (I didn't want to buy any more groceries...and let's just say Maddie won't be ready for a sit down restaurant any time soon.) And during lunch we got the call.
The passports would be ready at 3:30 p.m.
Woooohooooo!!!!!
We went back to the apartment, so Maddie could take a quick nap and I could finish packing. I made a quick call to Meshack on Skype to let him know...but then promptly forgot to post something (sorry about that! Thankfully clear thinking returned later, and he agreed to fill you all in ;)
We finally left the apartment around 3:20 and walked the six blocks to the passport office.
When we arrived my heart sank.
They had spelled our last name wrong.
Good grief.
Thankfully, this is one part of the process which isn't inefficient.
Go figure. They must have had thi happen before. ;)
Actually, I'm sure of it. The Haug's passport was misspelled as well.
They actually WROTE the correction in the passport and then stamped it.
I had it corrected in less than 15 minutes.
WE HAD THE PASSPORT!!!!!
We could finally for Kiev!!!!
Okay...that is easier said than done.
We flew down to the bus station to try to get on the 6:30 to Kiev.
They had two seats left. When I asked if Maddie could ride in my lap, they said 'sure'...but then realized the two seats were in the very front and they don't allow children to sit in the front.
UGH!
So we looked at another option.
A mini-bus.
Kiril called it something like a Matruska (I know that's not right)...but he said it would be cold and a bit uncomfortable.
Okaaaay.
Let's look at hiring a driver then. I just wanted out. I didn't want to have to sit around waiting until 11 p.m., when we could be there just a few minutes later by bus or car! I wanted out now.
Yea...real mature I know. But I was done. We had the passport...I needed to get started on the next leg of the journey.
Kiril found a cab driver to take us back to the apartment to consider our options. As we headed back, he turned and told me he had talked to the driver who said he would be willing to take us to Kiev for $220.
Not too bad.
It cost us almost double that to come down and visit Maddie back in December.
I said, 'Take it.'
The guy dropped us off at the apartment to pick up our stuff.
He never returned.
UGH!
So we hailed another driver to take us over to drop off our apartment key and on the way, again, Kiril worked his magic. This driver had a friend who would take us for $220. All we had to do was wait another half an hour for him to be ready.
No problem.
By 7 p.m. we were on our way.
Maddie did great on the trip. She slept for most of it...and sat quietly during the rest of it. I think she was a bit scared of the driver.
So was I.
Not that I was doubting his abilities...but the guy was driving like he was a member of the Penske racing team! We were doing 180 kph at one point. Things were whizzing by...and just about the time I would doze off, he would slam on the brakes to slow down to go around someone.
We arrived four hours later.
Yes...you read that right. Four hours later!
It took us over six back in December.
We were so early that Bogdan's crew wasn't expecting us so I had to call and wake Bogdan up so I could get the key to the apartment.
We finally got our stuff loaded into the aparment and as I walked into the living room to drop off a bag and there, sitting on the computer desk was a bouquet of pink roses, a card and a basket of fruit.
Inside, the note said, Congrulations! You're one step closer to home.
I told you Bogdan was the best.
And he's right.
We were finally in the homestretch.
Tomorrow would be incredibly busy...but it didn't matter.
In less than 36 hours we should be on our way home.

Pinch Hitting Meshack

Hello!! Meshack(I), will try to fill you all in since Tami won't be able to for a while. Tami said the passport was finally in her possession in the afternoon Odessa time, and Maddie and her were going to Kiev as soon as transportation was available. Tami was catiously optimistic, but it looks like a trip to AMC and the US embassy on Friday. If all goes well then Mom and Maddie will be arriving home at 7:30pm local time Saturday night. She will pick back up on blogging as soon as technolgy is available. Thanks to all for your compassion, kind words and encouragement.
Tami and I are grateful to all!

Meshack and Maddie's brothers and sister

on the bright side

I have decided to follow my mother's sage advice to start thanking God for all of this. While I don't know if I'm quite ready to thank Him for not delivering on the passport, there are several things for which I should be incredibly thankful. I'm hoping it will help my attitude to share them with you. So here they are...David Letterman style.

Tami's Top Ten Things to be Thankful For...

10. It's been warmer in Odessa than at home. I came to Ukraine expecting to be living in the deep freeze. Truth be told, I'm wearing my coat most days, but no scarf, gloves or long underwear. And we haven't had an inch of snow since I've been here. Not so much as a dusting. Something to truly be thankful for.

9. Pringles and Snickers are sold here. Yes, I've turned to my friends, Mr. Pringles and Mr. Snickers. I am SO glad these old friends have found their way to Odessa. They've kept me company more than a few nights while I've been here. Of course they're not doing my 'Ukraine diet' much good, but I gave up on hoping to lose 15 pounds a long time ago. I'll wish for 5. It's a start!

8. My cushy apartment. Yep, I'm pretty thankful for Odessa Executive Suites and the American who started it. I have high-speed internet, a jacuzzi tub, satellite TV, a king sized bed, a DVD player and a washing machine...all with western decor. What more could a girl ask for? Before you go getting all 'enjoy the culture' on me, just know during Punky and JacJac's adoption, we definitely lived with the locals. I've been there, done that. Since Meshack had to leave, I felt like I needed to be as comfortable as possible. And this place is great!

7. The Haug's are on their way to Kiev. We thought for awhile that their daughter's passport was with Maddie's, but evidentally it was just hung up somewhere. Today it was found and the family left at 5:30 p.m. local time for Kiev. They should be pulling into the capital city in a little over three hours. I'm so happy for them...really I am. I have to admit I was excited when I found out theirs was here, because I was absolutely convinced Maddie's would be too, and then experienced profound disappointment once again. But once I got over the intial shock I realized they really NEEDED that passport to be here today. They've been here FOREVER and have been through so much. They are more than ready to come home. If anyone had to beat me home, I'm glad it's them. BUT NO ONE ELSE!!!! I'M NEXT!

6. Bogdan. The man that I keep saying I'll introduce you to, but haven't gotten around to yet. Bogdan is an amazing human being. He works in an orphanage in Kiev with 'graduates' - children who have aged out of the system. He does an amazing job and I promise to introduce you to him someday. In the meantime, if you are coming to Kiev in the near future and would like a great apartment to stay in with all the western amenities...for a song, let me know. The money goes toward the graduate program, so you'd be doing the kids and yourself a favor. The apartment is a little out of the way (pretty close to the airport) but it's an easy subway ride to Independence Square, Kreshadik and the SDA. And for an added bonus...Bogdan speaks English not only fluently, but without an accent. It's weird. It's like you're talking to an American. And even after only a few days in Ukraine, you'll be craving that, I promise! :)

5. Tomorrow is Thursday...the day the passport is expected to arrive. I'm trying incredibly hard not to place all of my hope on this one day, but I have to admit I'm inching closer and closer. The passport will come when the Lord decides it needs to get here - and not a moment sooner. Several people have mentioned to me that there maybe SOMEONE who needs my help here. They encouraged me to look around. I'm looking...but not seeing.

5. Sandra. My friend is gone, but her impact on my experience remains. Meshack and I truly have made a lifelong friend in Sandra. She met us during one of the most trying times in her adoption experience, but exhibited true Southern hospitality in graciously showing us the sights and introducing us to the Kiev bus and subway system. We would have been lost without her. She is on her way home (as you read this) with her daughter, Annalee. Head on over to her blog and welcome her home, and then read her full story. You'll be amazed. I promise!

4. It's not August. While I would love to see Odessa in the spring or fall, there's no way you would catch me here in the dead of summer. UGH! You remember how much I HATE summer, right? I can't imagine being here, on the Black Sea (heat and humidity) without air conditioning. The thought makes my hair get all frizzy!

3. All my bloggy friends. You all have kept me company, cheered me up and cheered me on in the last year. I'm so happy to have your support. I don't know what I would have done without it in the last 48 hours. Thank you!

2. Meshack. I couldn't have done this without him. While I won't lie to you, this experience has stretched us, it certainly hasn't broken us (except maybe financially! :) He's my rock.

1. Maddie. How could I make a list of things I'm thankful for in Ukraine without mentioning this precious little girl. She has already changed my world - for that I am eternally grateful. She is a precious gift on loan from God. One which we get to help mold into a strong Christian woman. I can't wait to see what great things God has in store for her! ;)

So there you are, my top 10. I have to admit, it has helped a little. It took my mind off my situation, at least for a time. I'm still anxious about tomorrow. Part of me is hopeful and the other part is dreading it - afraid it won't arrive.
My facilitator is sending a translator (Kiril) down tonight to help me with this last little bit. It gives me some hope that they truly believe the passport will be here tomorrow.
As always, I'll keep you updated, although if we do leave tomorrow I won't have a lot of time to post something in depth.
It will probably be pretty short.
Pray for short.

the war within

Warning: Rant Ahead - Please feel free to skip today's post. It's all part of that honesty bit I gave you yesterday. Unfortunately I honestly feel pretty cruddy right now and I'm having a hard time processing all the junk I went through today. The following post is real. The names have not been changed to protect the innocent (except for Maddie) and I'm starting to understand why Russians and Ukranians love their vodka so much. (Don't worry, Mom...I'm still a skim milk totaler! ;)
----------------------------------
Thank you everyone for your comments yesterday. They did my heart good.
I wish I had a more cheerful post to give you today, but I don't.
The news is not good.
They have lost Maddie's passport.
Well...okay, they didn't technically LOSE it. They just sent it to different town.
The point is, it's been sitting there for two days and was only discovered because we started asking about it.
Did you hear that screaming this morning?
That was me.
Evidentally, Maddie's passport is sitting in a passport office somewhere in the middle of who knows where. It now has to make its way BACK to Kiev...where some bureaucrat will put a stamp in it saying it has been to the middle of nowhere and is now back in Kiev. Then the bureaucrat will hand the passport off to a courier who will hopefully bring it to the right city this time.
The earliest I'll see it is Thursday.
I'm not counting on it.
If the passport does not come on Thursday, I will miss my opportunity to get to the U.S. Embassy before the weekend, thereby forcing me to stay here through the weekend. I know I've mentioned how I feel about weekends right now.
To add insult to injury..there is, of course, no way to get back the 'expediting fee' we paid to the person at the passport office. Since the fee isn't 'official' there is no way to collect my 'expediting fee' even though my passport certainly wasn't expedited.
Unfortunately, I'm not alone.
It looks as if the Haug's are in the same boat.Their daughter's passport was also sent from Kiev on Saturday...it also has not yet arrived.

Hmmmm...I wonder if it's out in the middle of nowhere too?

Somebody is out searching for it. I think they'll need a search team...with cadaver dogs. It may be the only hope.

The Haug's are real troopers. They've been here longer than I have. They had the same SDA appointment date on Dec. 5th (we actually passed in the hall), but they didn't take the two week break, so they're going on 60 days.

I'm only on day 43.
On a more insightful, serious note. Remember back in December when I talked about the easiest trap to get caught in, in international adoption was to get caught up in your circumstances?
That's where I am right now.
All I can see is what I CAN'T have. And as you can most certainly 'hear' in my 'voice' today, my attitude continues to get worse and worse.
And that's not a good place to be.
Again, I'm at a place where it's taking all I have in me not to become bitter.
But this time I don't feel like I'm winning the battle.
---------------------------
Several people commented on the name change issues I mentioned in yesterday's post. Don't worry, I didn't take any offense. I just wanted to make sure we are all on the same page.
Actually, my gripe wasn't in what they were calling her (I am still calling her both, using the hyphenated name technique.) I think my issue was more with the fact that they weren't asking me what her new name was, or interested at all in how she was doing. There was no recognition on THEIR part of the changes Maddie had just gone through...and very little respect in the fact that I was now her mother. They kept calling me mama but didn't defer to me in any way in regards to her behavior.
It's a culture thing I know...and I'm just overly sensative right now.
When I look back on it, I realize a lot of what she was exhibiting was just a preference for the familiar. They are the only family she has EVER known. Of course she's going to want to stay with them, prefer them. To her right now I'm just a nice lady who gives her apple juice and plays with her.
It will take time.
After three (now four) international adoptions I know it in my head...it just hurt a lot in my mother's heart. Everything hurts right now.
The good news is Maddie is starting to respond when I use just her 'new' name and is starting to understand more and more of what I say. We had a pretty good day today (passport stuff aside.) If I can keep her away from anyone speaking Russian, I should be in good shape. ;)

rough and tumble

I promised myself three things when I started this blog. I vowed I would try to blog every day, write actively and with a strong voice...and I swore I would always be honest. Honesty is the only defense pre-adoptive parents have in the crazy world of international adoption. It is the only thing that really prepares them for what they're about to go through. I knew if I sugar coated the process I wouldn't do anyone any favors. Besides, I wanted this blog to act as a journal for Maddie...to show her what we went through to find her.
Today is the first day I have ever regretted that decision.
I was so tempted to skip today's blog or to gloss over what happened..but in the end decided to share it for one simple reason.
I know I'm not alone.
The truth is what happened to me today happens, in one degree or another, to almost all adoptive parents early on in the process...especially the ones who are adopting children who have been in the system their whole life.
As you are reading this, please keep in mind the orphanage is the only home Maddie has ever known. The workers are her only family. The children her only siblings. Of course she prefers them.
Then read on.
It's not pretty...but it's necessary.
--------------------------
I hit the brick wall today.
I was hoping to avoid it...but today it shot up in front of me when I least expected it and I hit it full force.
I'm sick of being here!
I want out...
NOW!
Sigh.
It's sad really. I only have a few more days, if everything goes well...but those days are looming large. I feel like every second is dragging by, every minute lasts an eternity...let's not talk about the hours.
I think even Maddie is starting to feel it. She was a little less cooperative today...a little more stubborn. Not to be unexpected...but certainly not welcome when all I want to do is go home.
To make it worse, today I got my hopes up.
I should have known better.
What was I thinking?
I called my facilitator, who is in Kiev, to ask about the progress on the passport. She (not Lev) told me she expected it to be there this afternoon but she would call me and let me know for sure.
Well, you know me...I jump right to the wrong conclusions and start dreaming about getting the heck out of Dodge.
I'm still here.
The passport is not.
So...we're back to plan A...it should be here tomorrow.
Yea...right.
Add to that the fact that I think my daughter hates me and you see why I'm so miserable.
Let me back this story up a bit.
Lev left me on my own, the day we brought Maddie home from the orphanage.
Cool. I can handle it. She's doing pretty well, I thought, and this would give us some time to bond without a Ukranian here to translate everything or second guess my parenting skills.
The bad news is he's not coming back...and he's not being replaced. I am on my own...permanently! He has another family coming in this week for their SDA appointment, so he can't come back here...and the big facilitator's mom is just home from the hospital, so she can't come down. So I get the joy of finishing this leg of the journey on my own.
Good thing I've adopted internationally before or I may just take this kid and hit the road! All I have to do is wait for the passport and get passport pictures taken for her visa.
Okay...now on to why my daughter doesn't like me.
Lev was supposed to arrange for someone to come pick us up on Friday to take us to a bank to sign over Maddie's account to the orphanage. They say it's not a whole lot of money, but asked that we give it to them.
Sure, no problem. Except they never came.
That same person was supposed to take us to get the passport pictures.
So this morning I took things into my own hands.
After confirming with Lev that he had no idea when the driver would arrive, I arranged (through Sandra's translator) for a driver to come pick us up and take us to get the pictures taken. I figured it would be one less step I had to worry about...and I knew I HAD to get it done before the embassy interview. I figure if the orphanage wants the money that badly they'll figure out a way to get it before I leave. (told you I had a bad attitude!)
So we went to get the pictures taken...and that's when it all started going so very badly.
Not the picture part of it.
That was fine.
It was Maddie's reaction to the Ukranians.
She loved them.
She wanted to be with them.
She most definitely didn't want to be with me.
The driver took us to a photo shop where his wife worked. She was wonderful with Maddie...gave her a little toy to occupy her while the pictures were processed and then accompanied us to get something else done to the photos. They were both so very nice.
Too nice.
All Maddie wanted to do was hold her hand.
She grabbed her hand to cross the street and dropped mine like a hot potato.
Maddie grabbed her hand in the car and didn't want to let go.
And then when the woman got out of the car and said 'baka baka' Maddie started to cry.
Aaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!
I wanted to scream, "I AM YOUR MOMMMY! NOT THIS STRANGER!"
But I didn't.
I just cringed inside.
Needless to say, the passport fiasco just added to my misery.
Then, we had no sooner gotten back to the apartment when Lev called and said the driver from the orphanage was there. Were we ready to go?
Sure...why not. I'm a glutton for punishment.
We bundled back up and went out to meet the driver.
Maddie knew him.
That should have been my cue. However, in my current state of mind, I missed that flaming neon sign completely.
He helped her into the van and off we went.
We arrived at the bank...and long story short (it's too long, I didn't even understand half of it) we have to go back tomorrow. After 30 minutes of yelling and screaming at the bank controller (I know it's the controller, because I had the time to translate the word in my Russian book) , the orphanage workers came back and told me the controller wanted Meshack's signature.
I laughed.
Out loud.
'He's in America,' I said.
'He's in America,' the lady told the controller.
'Hrrrumph,' the controller said.
'Sigh,' I said.
So...we headed back to the van for what I thought was a ride home. Instead the driver asked if it would be alright if we went back to the orphanage.
Okaaaaay.
All the way there wild thoughts flew through my mind.
'Was the crazy orphanage director going to try and get more money out of me,' 'Was the money from that account that important,' 'Would it keep me from going home,' 'Was this a setup to blackmail me out of more cash?'
Seeeee...crazy thoughts. But that's where my mind is. The stress of being here is combining with my fears and creating a mental game I'm not up to playing.
We finally arrived, walked through the gates and up to the administrative building. I was on the verge of a panic attack and was working on a plan of attack.
It never occured to me that no one in this building spoke English.
Remember the taxi pantamimes?
Seeee...I told you I was stressed.
We walked into the building and straight to the director's office. As soon as Maddie saw the director she yelled something and RAN to the director.
She climbed up into her lap and the director just kept saying, 'Nastya, Nastya.'
Sigh.
'She has a new name you know. She's never going to learn her new name if she keeps getting called Nastya all the time.' - No I didn't say it.
I didn't say anything.
Evidentally all that was going on was that the driver needed to come back and pick up the executive staff for their nightly drive home. He gathers them all up and takes them to their prospective bus stops.
It was time to go.
I called Maddie to come with me and she looked at me with a crazed look in her eye and backed herself into the corner. The director kept talking to 'Nastya' and I heard the word 'Mama' every so often. Finally, the director walked Maddie back over to me and I picked her up.
She started crying.
Yea...made me feel real great.
The director kept talking to her as we walked back out to the van.
When we reached the van, the driver opened the door and I set Maddie inside.
Now you have to realize the van is a big van...it's more like a mini-bus. It requires two steps to get into and there was no way I could just carry her into the van, so I had to hand her off.
One of the ladies grabbed Nastya...and didn't give her back.
The whole way back to our apartment, as we dropped people off, Nastya Maddie sat on this woman's lap and just drank in all the attention. She laughed, sang songs and shouted out 'machina' every few blocks.
And then she got over-stimulated.
She went nuts.
She tried kissing the lady all over her face...then tried kissing the lady sitting in front of her. She got loud and refused to quiet down and got so squirmy I could tell the lady was getting a bit uncomfortable.
But she never gave her back.
Finally we reached a stop where everyone got out.
The driver told me, '100 meters' and pointed in a general direction.
'Oh, I was getting out too. Okay.'
So I climb out, the lady hands Maddie to me...who promptly starts crying again.
Sigh.
Everyone walks off after telling 'Nastya' 'baka baka.'
I stood on the street corner lost.
Not literally...I knew exactly where I was.
It was figuratively.
I had hit the brick wall at 200-million miles an hour and I couldn't find the energy to pick myself up and cross the street.
I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned around to find the orphanage director.
She grabbed Maddie from me and crossed the street.
I followed along like a lost puppy.
All along the 100 meters, the director kept telling 'Nastya' wonderful things about her new Mama. I chose to believe they were wonderful things because I don't understand a lick of Russian and I'm too tired to really care.
We finally arrived at Boonina 21 and the director turned to me, handed Maddie back to me, said 'Baka Baka' to Maddie and 'Das Vedanya' to me...and off she went.
Okay...she's not so crazy after all.
I on the other hand, am.
We walked back through the scary alley to our apartment...all the while Maddie is chatting with me as if nothing had happened. There's no crying, no nothing.
Until we close the door of our apartment to the outside world.
And then the flood gates open.
The tears were mine.
I haven't felt this spent, this lost, this overwhelmed in a very long time.
Maybe ever.
All I can do is pray.
Pray the passport comes tomorrow.
Pray I have the strength to endure the train ride back to Kiev...by myself.
And pray the U.S. Embassy has pity on me and processes Maddie's visa in one day so I can head home on Thursday.
Sigh.

playing dress up

Another quiet day in Maddie's Odessa home.
We spent the day playing, watching more videos and doing pretty much whatever Maddie wanted to do.
Not that I'm spoiling her! ;)
There's not much to tell about today. We're pretty much just waiting for tomorrow. (A terrible attitude to have, but one that I've resigned myself to, in this process.) We're always waiting for tomorrow.
On this particular tomorrow we're supposed to go to a bank to sign over whatever money Maddie has in her orphanage account and then get some passport pictures taken for her visa. According to Lev...the passport should be ready on Tuesday.
We'll see.
I'm at the point when I'll believe it when I'll see it.
I have to admit, I've taken on somewhat of a funk in the last few days. Now that I have Maddie, I see no reason why I should be here any longer than absolutely necessary...and weekends seem absolutely unnecessary. (Sorry...but it's true!) I can't get anything done on a weekend...I just have to endure them.
Hopefully Monday will bring a better attitude.
In the meantime, here's some more video. Sorry if you've had your fill of Maddie cuteness...but her daddy hasn't. Every time I talk to him he begs me to post more.
So here ya go Papa! Enjoy!
Today's selection is of Maddie playing dress-up. In case you miss the commentary...Maddie is dressing up in Sandra's clothes. She has her purse, hat and thermal underwear as a scarf (don't worry...they're clean! ;)
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what more could a girl want?

It was another day of firsts for Maddie.
The first time talking on a phone.
The first time using a washing machine.
And the first time eating at the golden arches...Mikky D's.
Let's start off with the phone.
Maddie got to talk to Q-ball, Punky, JacJac and of course Daddy today.
She loved it.
She giggled, babbled and stared at the Skype phone while listening to each one of them. It was amazing to watch. She looked startled when she first heard the voice on the other end of the line (internet) then gradually warmed up. I tried showing each person's picture to her as she talked to them. I don't know if she got the idea or not, but she sure had something to say.
She can pronounce everyone's name pretty well, with her cute little Ukranian accent, but has a hard time with Q-balls. For some reason she has decided to call him 'walla'. I don't get it...it's not even close.
I'm not sure what he thinks - but I imagine he'll be just fine.
Maddie also helped me with the laundry today. She really is a pretty good little helper. She helped me drop the clothes over the balcony railing onto the couch below. (It never occured to me that it wasn't a great idea to teach a preschooler to do that...but she enjoyed it.) Then she helped me jam it all into the small washer. I put in the soap and she pushed the button.
After it was done she helped me pull it all out and hang it up on the drying rack.
I can't wait to get home to my dryer!
After the chores were done, Sandra, Maddie and I headed to McDonalds. We just had to have a burger...and it's a right of passage in our family for the kids to have their first McDonald's experience BEFORE they leave their home country.
We couldn't miss it.
Maddie loved it!
She was a bit overwhelmed at first by all of the noise, people and energy...but after awhile she settled right down and ate her lunch.
Mmm-mmm...
Chicken nuggets, french fries, apple juice and barbeque sauce goodness.
What more could a girl want?
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from day one

What a great and marvelous day.
It couldn't have been more perfect.
I don't think it gets any better than this.
I have our little girl.
The little girl we have waited forever to find is finally ours.
Sigh.
And so far, the honeymoon is great.
She's doing incredibly well with all of the changes. Especially since Lev said he doesn't think anyone explained to her what was going on.
Jiminy.
The only true meltdown came last night with the bath. Other than that she hasn't so much as thrown a tantrum.
Oh...she's done the pouty, throw-myself-on-the-floor routine, but I quickly corrected that, and as my roomie, Sandra, will tell you...it hasn't reappeared.
She came back from the little town where her daughter is, to spend the weekend in civilization. If you saw the pictures of the place where she's staying I think you would agree she made the right decision.
Her visits with her daughter, Annalee are limited...and since the weekend stretched endlessly in front of her she thought she would come to town to hang out with Maddie and I.
She was really hoping to see Maddie's 'vapor' episodes...she has been disappointed.
Today Maddie and I spent a relatively quiet day inside. We went out for a quick walk to the store, but spent most of the day just hanging out inside the apartment.
We played games, read books, watched Veggietales and Teletubbies (which she loves), ate a ton of yogurt, did our hair and read some more books.
Around suppertime Sandra arrived and Maddie was so excited.
We are really going to have to work on our attachment issues.
Maddie was in her face.
Thankfully, as an adoptive parent, Sandra knows all about this stuff and is totally supportive with the 'please don't hold her and let me do everything for her' thing.
Maddie went to sleep without too much fuss.
I'm already planning tomorrow.
I think we're ready for our first excursion.
Maybe a trip to McDonald's?
I'll let you know.
In the meantime, I'll leave you with some more Maddie cuteness.
Today's video is brought to you by Quaker Oats Oatmeal...the breakfast of little girls adopted from Odessa's Orphanage 1...and Dole bananas.
Maddie highly recommends both! ;)
-----------------------------

look at what was in my inbox...

Aren't they cute?!

Meshack decided to surprise me.

It made me cry...in a good way.

They are now the background on my computer screen...I see them every time I turn this thing on.

And hopefully in just a week, I'll be able to see them in person.

I can't wait!

i gotcha

I woke up bright and early this morning...ready to head to the orphanage.
Lev didn't. He slept in.
Okay...he didn't really sleep in. He left at 5 a.m. to meet the first train to pick up some paperwork Meshack sent over. I guess I can't complain too much, but he didn't get back up and around until 10 a.m...and by that time I was about ready to drag him out the door by the collar of his black leather coat!
Sigh.
There were a million items on the agenda today. We had to...

• Translate the document Lev picked up.
• Apply for Maddie's passport.
• Get some pictures taken for the orphanage and for the embassy.
• Check Maddie out of the orphanage.
• Hand out all of the gifts I brought with me.

The problem was I hadn't finished buying all of the presents I had brought with me! :) I am a procrastinator at heart...so I used everyone's sage advice to wait until I arrived in the region to purchase anything to my advantage. My excuse...it would save on valuable luggage space and weight and would give me something to do during the 10 day wait.
Unfortunately, I didn't take advantage of the 10-day wait. Being a true procrastinator I waited until the last minute.
Like five minutes before we left for the orphanage.
Actually I was a little better than that. I had purchased most of the gifts the night before at a office supply store across the street. I bought the orphanage lawyer and inspector a nice pen set each. A little impersonal, but when you're desperate you're desperate...besides I don't really know these women. The only time I saw them was on the day we met Maddie and again on the court date.
Have I mentioned I don't like this part of the process?
So anyway...I woke up this morning and realized the present I actually did bring with me for the orphanage director, just wasn't right. It wasn't her. I needed something else.
So I dragged Lev across the street to help me pick out something else.
Five minutes later I came out with yet another pen set, a year planner and a binder thingy that he said would be good.
Whatever.
I quickly brought it back to the apartment, put it in a gift baggie and off we went.
We walked through the scary alley (which isn't so scary in the daytime) to find a late 70's model Lada waiting for us.
I had never seen anything so beautiful.
I didn't care that it was a leftover from the Soviet era. This rusted out piece of history was taking me to my daughter.
It could have been a turnip truck for all I cared.
Today was Gotcha Day!
I have to say - what the tan Lada lacked in outward styling, it more than made up for in digital quality sound. The guy had the little matchbox tricked out.
There was a video player in the dash, which I prayed he wouldn't watch WHILE we were driving. And the stereo was good enough to make Vanilla Ice sound good.
With 'Ice, Ice Baby' blaring out of the back speakers, we raced through the streets of Odessa on our way to the orphanage.
This time I didn't care.
We couldn't get there fast enough.
We arrived at the Orphanage number 1 a short time later. I paid the cabbie 40 grivna and said my customary 'spasiba'. As I was getting out he said, 'Congratulations.'
How awesome was that?!
I said thank you - this time in English, grabbed my five bags and walked through the gate.
We first went to the administrative building. Lev was going to ask to use one of their computers to translate Meshack's document. He told me to go ahead and hand out the presents while I waited.
So I did.
First, I gave a little present to the director's secretary. Paulina had been a godsend. She called cabs for me everyday...and made to sure they called to let her know when they had arrived - so I wouldn't have to wait out in the cold.
She always had a smile for me...a rare treat.
Another small gift went to the security lady, Lara, who buzzed me in every morning. She was the one I did charades with to get to Paulina...she was also almost like a babushka (grandmother) to Maddie. Every time Maddie saw Lara, she would run up to the woman, give her a hug and then hold her hand out for the piece of candy that was sure to come. Lara always made time for Maddie.
The rest of the gifts were for the lawyer, doctors, caregivers and director. I also left a little box of cookies for the kids.
I hope they get them.
Finally I sat down to wait for Lev.
I waited, and waited (anyone want to chime in here?)...and waited.
Two hours later he was finally done.
Or so I thought.
The plan was to go ahead and take Maddie to apply for the passport and get those pictures taken and then bring her back to the orphanage to check her out.
To save time, though, Lev decided to go ahead and fill out the paperwork now, so we wouldn't have to do it later. That was a first.
So he translated the form for me, I filled in the blanks. It went pretty well, but then he started walking from one office to another...I have no idea what he was doing, but he would literally walk out of one office, walk through another door, come back out a few minutes later, go down the hall to another office, then come back to the first.
He did this at least five times.
I guess no one believes in holding meetings.
Anyway...finally he said it was time to go get Maddie.
Unfortunately by this time she was already in the middle of her nap.
The caregivers were none to happy about waking her up and then they saw the coat I had brought for her. Lev translated what the woman said to me, but there was no need. I could tell.
She thought it was too 'flimsy' (that's the word he used)...and wasn't good enough.
Let's not go there lady! Alright?!
You are speaking to a woman who has been waiting in this country FOREVER...way longer than should be necessary!!! I have three children at home who I haven't seen in WEEKS and who do not freeze in the winter. I know how to dress my child!!!! And she IS my child now, so if you don't want to put the coat on her, I'll do it myself.
Besides if you will look in the backpack you are holding you will find a shirt, a sweater, an undershirt to go along with the coat.
SHE WILL BE FINE!!!!
No, of COURSE I didn't say that...but I sure WANTED to!!!
I sighed...pulled out the clothing, the woman gave me a dirty look and turned around to go get Maddie dressed.
So much for international relations.
A few minutes later a groggy Maddie walked into the room in the clothes I had packed...except for the scarf and gloves. Thinking that they didn't think my scarf and gloves were good enough, I grabbed the bag, pulled them out, took the stuff off that she had on and replaced it myself.
Then we turned and walked out.
Little did I realize we wouldn't be coming back.
We grabbed a cab and Maddie's adventure began.
Her reaction her first car ride was mixed. At first she was overwhelmed and pretty much stayed glued to my side. I was worried about her throwing up so I asked if the driver could take it easy.
It didn't help much.
But a few minutes into the ride, Maddie climbed onto my lap to look out the window. We talked about cars and busses, vans and trucks.
She loved every minute of it.
Okay, this next part I am not making up....seriously.
I was in ANOTHER minor fender bender.
Strange...but true.
I'm telling you I must have some sort of magnetized attraction to the worst luck in finding cabbies.
Actually, I don't know if you can call this an accident.
It was more of an incident.
Our car...another lada..scraped fenders with a Toyota SUV.
I'm not even sure the cabbie felt it. No one stopped. No one seemed to care.
But I'm telling you, it happened.
Sigh.
I wish I could swear off riding in cabs. Unfortunately I can't do that until I get on a plane out of here. THEN...I will vow never to ride in a taxi again.
Unless of course it's driven by Brad Pitt.
Then I MAY reconsider.
Finally we arrived at the passport office.
Maddie did great.
She stayed right beside me, but talked with everyone she came upon. Not tantrums, no boredom (except for mine)...she was a trooper.
We ended up having to wait for an hour or so for our passport appointment, so we went back to the apartment and waited while Lev went to have a document notarized right across the street.
While we waited, Maddie had a snack of yogurt, juice, Pringles and a banana.
Mmmmm...quite a combination.
Finally it was time for us to head over to the notaries office where I signed my John Hancock. Again, Maddie did great. She played with stuff in my purse and just babbled to herself. She charmed the socks off the lawyer, which is tough to do. That lady is a toughie.
After that was done, we headed back to the passport office to finish up her application. The ladies in the passport office loved Maddie. They gave her two pieces of candy before they took the picture and then gave her another for being such a big girl.
The girl is a charmer.
This is where I realized it had all gone wrong.
I thought we were catching another cab to head back to the orphanage to check Maddie out. But Lev started walking.
We walked and walked and walked.
Finally, I go up the nerve to ask.
Turns out, unbeknownst to me, we had already checked her out. We weren't going back to the orphanage. She was mine.
But what about taking pictures with the oraphange workers? Asking about her schedule? Getting good luck notes from everyone who knew her?
What about that?
Too late.
What was done, was done.
So I have no pictures of Maddie with her groupa. I have no pictures of her with her caregivers. I have no notes of encouragment from the orphanage director.
I have nothing.
Why doesn't that surprise me?
I had checked my child out of the orphanage and didn't even know it.
Sigh.
It was a great day...it was just a little marred by the disappointment.
There would be no goodbye for Maddie.
On the way back to the apartment, we stopped by McDonalds for some chicken nuggets to go. I was too tired and disappointed to fix any meat for supper, but figured if I combined the nuggets with some noodles and corn I'd have a meal fit for a princess.
She loved it.
Then we watched a little VeggieTales - it was lost on her. I guess you've got to know the language to truly appreciate Bob and Larry.
Finally it was bath time.
It wasn't fun.
For the first three kids this part of the first night 'home' was a breeze. Everybody loved bath time.
Not this kid...she screamed.
Bloody murder.
The entire time.
So much so, I worried the neighbors would call the Ukranian version of social services.
We survived...but only because I used my hands to rinse her hair - that took forever. She was so upset she was shaking...visibly.
Poor thing.
I pulled her out of the tub, dried her off, put on some lotion (which she loved) and then got her dressed. As soon as she was in her footie pj's she climbed up in my lap for a good cuddle.
I just finished watching her drift off to sleep.
It doesn't get any better than that.
-------------------
Since I don't have any pictures from the orphanage today, here is some video I took after we got home. Enjoy!

update

Sorry for the delay in posting. Everything is great...I've got Maddie!!! I just haven't posted because (a) there's tons to say and (b) living with a 3 yr old means I don't have a lot of time to type up.
I'm working (as we speak) on posting an update. When it's finished I'll take this little note down and put up the details. You want a sneak peak? Suffice it to say - there's never a dull moment in Ukraine.
Sigh.
But she's ours now.

almost done

We have the Tax ID number.
Boy...that was easy. I hate to even mention how easy it was because it has caused so many other people such headaches. Lev was in and out in a couple of hours.
While he was doing official stuff...I was doing fun stuff.
I took our cab over to the orphanage and visited Maddie.
It was the first time I had seen her in two days...and she was THRILLED!
As soon as she saw me she ran across the room and threw herself into my arms yelling, 'Maaaama, Maaaama, Maaaama...' in her cute little Ukranian accent.
It melted my heart.
She took me by the hand to the play room where we sat down and started digging through her backpack.
While she was trying to figure out what to play with first, I chatted with the French couple.
'Have you been sick,' the wife asked.
'No...just paperchasing.'
'Aaaah,' she said with a knowing smile. 'Well, Maddie missed you very much. When she saw we were here to play, but you were not, she cried and cried and cried.'
Awwwww...she missed me! I'm so glad she missed me. I mean, I don't want her to HAVE to miss me...but I'm glad she did.
I'm just sorry she HAD to.
Good news though.
Starting tomorrow...she won't HAVE to!
Tomorrow is GOTCHA DAY!
Woohooooooooo!!!
Can I get a 'woohoo'?!!
Tomorrow Maddie leaves orphanage life behind her forever and starts a new one with the crazy clan I call my own.
Her life will forever change. I can't even begin to imagine what she will be thinking as we take off in a car, probably for the first time; ride a train - I know for the first time; ride in a plane - obviously for a first time; and meet her brothers and sisters, for the very first time.
There will be a lot of firsts in the next few days, but first we have some more paperchasing to do.
It's pretty simple stuff. The only thing holding me in Odessa right now is waiting for the passport. Once I have that I can return to Kiev (via train...ugh) where we will do the embassy bit.
Been there...done that...and I have three kids in t-shirts to prove it.
I can handle that part.
Then we get to come home. Hopefully in the middle of next week.
I can't wait.
Meanwhile...I've got stuff to do here.
I went shopping today for gifts. It's customary for adopting families to give gifts to the orphanage staff on their going-away day. I have to admit - I've always HATED this part.
I'm not good at giving gifts...especially to complete strangers.
And there are no gift cards here.
Sigh.
So I went with the old stand-by.
Chocolate, candles and if they're high-ranking...a pen set.
Easy peasy.
I hope they don't think it's too cheesy.
I also went shopping for a set of boots for Maddie to wear when she leaves the orphanage. Did you know even the most simple pair of snow boots run $70?
SEVENTY BUCKS!
Insane.
So I bought her rain boots.
Heeeheee.
They're ugly too. But at least she won't get her new pair of pink tennies all muddy. And if I let her wear them here, believe you me, she would get them muddy. Even if I carried her everywhere. The mud is incidious.
So I'll let her wear the nasty little pair of pink, plastic boots until we leave Kiev.
Lev complained her feet will get cold.
I told him she could wear extra socks.
Like I'm going to let my kid freeze.
Jimminy.
You would think I hadn't parented any children before. None of my kids have never frozen off a toe. And I will have you know that it is colder at home than it is here, thank you very much. I think I know what I am doing!!!!!
Okay...rant over.
Back to happy stuff.
So tomorrow I bring Maddie home to the cool apartment on Boonina street.
And she begins a new chapter in her life.
I wonder what it will be called.

back to the beginning

Today I did something I have never done in any of our adoptions.
I went back to the beginning.
We are at the part of the paperchase where it's time to get Maddie's birth certificate changed to reflect Meshack and I as her parents.
It's a big step - in more ways than one.
Lev and I hired a driver to take us to the small village where Maddie was born. It is located an hour outside of Odessa...I'm not sure in which direction.
I think it's north.
Don't quote me on that - I'm still all turned around.
It wasn't a long drive...unless you were with our driver.
He was a maniac.
No...I mean it. He was nuts. I don't think I've had this bad of a driver since I've been here. Well, except for maybe the 'drive on the sidewalk' cabbie. Yea...the cabbie was the worst. But this guy wasn't far behind.
Can anyone tell me what the 'mph' equivalent of 130 km/h is?
Do I want to know?
It seemed awful fast...of course that may be because I've been living in the city for the past three weeks and haven't had the opportunity for the driver to really let loose. Who knows. All I know for sure is that things were whizzing by.
Anyway...he was so focused on his driving that he missed our turn. And not just by a little bit. He missed it by a lot!
We went 20 minutes in the wrong direction! That's 20 minutes each way.
He finally stopped and asked for directions at a gas station.
Thank goodness.
I could tell by the exaggerated body language the men he was talking to were dumbstruck that he was so far off course. They pointed back in the direction we had came from...and kept jabbing their fingers in that direction.
We were way, way, way past our turn.
Anyway...as he was pulling out of the gas station to do a u-ie on the interstate...he pulled in front of another car who was also pulling out of the gas station...and yep, you guessed it - we had another fender bender.
WHAT IS IT WITH ME AND UKRANIAN CAB DRIVERS???!!!!
And Meshack wonders why I'm such a bad back seat driver. After this experience I would be surprised if I ever feel the urge to comment on Meshack or any other American's driving ability! They can't even begin to compare.
Thankfully, no injuries and no major damage.
Sigh.
We finally turned on the right road and I have to tell you - it was like going home.
We were in the country. There were cows grazing, combines sitting in the fields and every so often we would drive through a small town.
Granted...the houses were different and I don't usually see too many horse drawn wagons, but other than that I could have been back in Kansas, Colorado, Iowa or any other farming state.
We finally pulled into a bigger town (maybe 5,000) and Lev told me we were there.
There.
Wow.
This is where Maddie began.
This is where she was born.
This is probably where her birth-mother still lives.
Wow.
Words do not do justice to the my thoughts and feelings as we pulled into town. It's hard to explain everything that came over me. There are so many questions...many of which I can't find the words to utter.
But the biggest is...does she still have any family living around here?
We may never know.
While we waited for the birth certificate, Lev and I went to lunch at a local cafe (It was pretty good), I took a ton of pictures and then I called Meshack. I just had to share this experience.
He too was moved...even from half a world away.
This is as close as we may ever come to having any kind of real background information for Maddie.
There's nothing else.
No names.
No real dates.
No pictures.
Just the information I can glean from this small town...and I had minutes to get it done.
It was so overwhelming. The journalist in me had a million questions...and no way to ask them. Lev was busy in the office...and the driver spoke no English. So I took my pictures, jotted down notes about sights and sounds and then sat back to drink it all in.
That's the best I can do for her.
I hope someday, when she asks questions, it will be enough.
Finally, Lev called me into the office, I signed a couple of papers and they handed me the birth certificate with Maddie's new name and our names listed as her parents.
We are officially her mom and dad.
There was no time to relish the thought. We jumped back in the car to return to Kiev. As the maniac drove, I snapped pictures out the window. Shots of the apartment buildings, the train depot, a local grocery store, a man on a moped...whatever was in sight I shot it.
Frame after frame.
Picture upon picture.
Until finally the town was gone.
When we got back to Odessa, Lev had the birth certificate authenticated. Then he tried to apply for the Tax ID number, but the office was closed.
Oh well. It will wait until tomorrow.
Another thing that will have to wait is a visit with Maddie.
Again, I was so entrenched in the paperchase I missed both visiting hours.
Sigh.
Only a few more days.

she's ours!!!!!

Sorta...
Today is the day the court decree goes into effect. The 10 days of waiting are behind us and now we get to start the next round of paper chasing.
So, while I'm technically a mom of four beautiful kids now, I don't actually get custody of her until sometime later this week. I'll let you know when 'gotcha day' will be.
In the meantime, I'm chasing the all elusive paper.
Lev arrived around 9 a.m. and told me I needed to cancel my cab that would take me to the orphanage. We needed to run around all over town and wouldn't have time for my morning visit.
So I didn't get to visit Maddie today.
Sigh.
Maybe tomorrow.
Instead, I waited for Lev to change and then we headed to the courthouse to pick up the court decree. Evidentally there were quite a few changes that were going to need to be made, so Lev was just planning to drop it off and we would pick it up later.
It took an hour to drop it off.
(Insert hysterical laughing here...I'm at that point people! ;)
When Lev was finally done (I have no idea why I was even needed) we left and went back to the apartment and then out to lunch.
We dined at a cafe we ate at with Shad 10 days ago (has it really only been 10 days?!). I had a really good grilled chicken and rice. While we were eating I got a phone call. It was Sandra. She was on her way to Odessa...and could I use a roomie?
SURE!!
What fun!
Lev and I headed back to the apartment and met Sandra on the street corner. It was so good to see her again! :) We dropped her stuff off at the apartment, and after checking with Lev (who said he didn't need me at the courthouse), we headed out to explore the city. I took her to all the places I had been shown just a few days ago and gave her all the trivia I could remember.
She was impressed...I could tell! ;>)
We finally made it back to the apartment and talked until Sandra fell asleep...she hadn't really slept since she left the states so I guess I shouldn't assume she thought my conversation skills were lacking.
Tomorrow it's more paperchasing. We're supposed to go back to the courthouse to pick up the final decree and then head out to the town where Maddie was born to get the birth certificate changed.
After that, we'll try to get as much of the rest of it done as we can.
Hang on! We're in the home stretch!!!

hair stylin'

Today's visit was similar to yesterdays, minus the church goers, so I've decided to forgo a real post today (besides, I gave you enough to read yesterday to last all weekend! :)
Instead I'm giving you some new video of Maddie.
She's gotten bored with the toys I bring with me, so I pulled out a comb, hand lotion and lip gloss.
We had a great time. She especially loved the hand lotion.
So here you go...more Maddie cuteness.
I'll be back to regular blogging tomorrow.

an epiphany

Before I even arrived at the Detsky Dom this morning I knew something was up.
About four blocks from the orphanage we hit a traffic jam, like none I had seen in this part of town.
Usually it is incredibly quiet.
Stray dogs roam the streets, peasant women walk down the middle of the road on their way to the bus stop, and solemn seminary students carry their Bibles on their way to class at the monestary.
Not this morning.
Cars parked haphazardly alongside the road, bus after bus lumbered down the street...and at one point traffic was down to one lane.
What was going on?
My driver looked as perplexed as I did.
One thing I knew...there was no way he was going to get me to the orphanage gates. I
I was going to have to hoof it. I paid him the 30 grivna fare and jumped out of the car.
Now that I was out of the Toyota (chalk one up for luxury vehicle), I could see a little more clearly.
Not only were there tons of cars...there were people - everywhere.
And they were carrying water bottles.
Everyone. Large, small, old, young, rich and poor...everyone had a water bottle.
What was going on?
I found out later...
I'll leave you in suspense.
I walked up the drive toward the orphanage...on either side of the road, little tables were set up with people selling flower arrangments. And a very strong fragrance was in the air. I'm not exactly sure what it was, but it was familiar. Something I've smelled before. It was sweet...yet almost spicy.
Hmmmm...
I kept walking.
It got more crowded (if that was possible) the closer I got the to orphanage. I walked up to the gate and pushed the button and waited to be buzzed in.
The buzz finally sounded and I slipped inside the gate.
All was quiet.
Whatever was going on outside, hadn't affected this little part of Odessa.
I quickly made my way to Maddie's room for a great visit.
We stayed inside today, along with the French couple. I think they realize just how futile it is to visit with the kids outside. When I'm with the other kids in the groupa, they want my attention so badly they climb all over us, upsetting Maddie and interferring with our bonding.
I feel so bad for them.
I want to interact with them...but I also don't want to give them false hope. Many of them already refer to me as Mama. It's so sad.
So it's easier on everyone to stay inside...away from the little ones who just can't understand.
Today I brought an orange for Maddie. I thought it would be a good opportunity to see how good her fine motor skills are...and give her a little treat.
She LOVED it!
The orange was huge, but she ate the whole thing herself. Then she dug into my purse and pulled out a couple of strawberry nutri-grain bars and proceeded to down those as well.
The girl can eat!
Good news...she's not hording food at this point and she eats at a normal rate. When we adopted the other three they all had the propensity of trying to stuff as much food as they could in their mouth at a time. And there was never enough.
When I show Maddie that the food is all gone, she's perfectly content to move on.
All too soon it was time for me to leave.
It's getting harder and harder to leave her behind each day. It's hard on both of us. Maddie cries every time...in fact when the kids come in from 'recess' she immediately starts cuddling more...trying to buy more time with me (and away from her groupa). It's so hard to watch...and so hard to hear little wail. Overall Maddie isn't a crier, which makes it even harder -I know she's really feeling it if she's crying about it.
It wasn't until I was leaving Maddie's room I realized there might be a problem getting a cab back to the apartment.
How in the world was I going to find a cab in the mass of humanity?
I walked to the administrative building, showed the security 'guard' the phrase in my Russian book which says, 'Can you get me a taxi?' and waited for the moment of recognition.
It didn't come.
Through my improving charade skills I determined she didn't know the number of a taxi company.
So I called Lev.
He gave her the number...and she dialed. She talked with the cab company for awhile and I heard the addresses that have become so familiar to me.
'Mayachina tree' and 'Boonina'
Good, we were getting somewhere.
She hung up and started yammering at me in Russian. I had no idea where she was going with this. She said something about a Mercedes (another one for the luxury vehicles) then pointed down the street and pointed to a piece of paper.
Okay...I know the vehicle is a Mercedes and obviously I am supposed to meet him down the street because there's no way he can get up here. But what in the world does the piece of paper have to do with anything? And there are a million Mercedes here...in all kinds of models, years and colors. How was I supposed to know which one was my taxi (they rarely have a taxi light up top).
Sigh.
I called Lev back.
He interepreted...the car indeed was a Mercedes and I was supposed to meet it down by the grocery store on the corner. It was white (hence the paper).
Okaaaay.
Got it.
Off I went.
Outside the gate it was even more crowded than it was before (again, if that was possible)...and I could hear what sounded like a rams horn sounding in the distance. This time I also noticed the people going up toward the church up the street had empty bottles...but the people coming back from the cathedral had full bottles.
Okay...this obviously has something to do with water. But what?
I also noticed there were a couple of different types of flower arrangements. One looked kind of like a broom...straw wrapped with ribbon and flowers stuck in the ends. The other were more like flower arrangements...made with the same material.
Hmmmm....
The cross section of people making their way up and down the street was impressive. I used to think old babushkas were the only ones going to church with any regularity...but this morning there were teenagers, young couples with little kids, middle aged couples helping their elderly mothers carry the large jugs of water. I even passed a few orthodox priests.
And everyone seemed to be in a really good mood. There was a lot of chatter...happy chatter. More than I am typically used to hearing here.
I finally reached the end of the street and had my fears confirmed.
It was going to be incredibly difficult to find this cab.
There were three Mercedes parked in front of the grocery store alone...and one of them was cream colored. Thankfully there was no one inside. I'm getting so tired of walking up to a car, saying 'taxseee' in my worst Russian accent, only to have the person look at me like I'm a lunatic and saying, 'nyet, nyet' while shooing me out of their car! :)
I stood by a sorry looking tree and waited.
You know the rest by now.
I waited...and waited...and waited.
While I was waiting, I people watched.
I could tell when a bus was about to pull up to the corner. With about a minute to go, a crowd would suddenly form. Way too many people to fit on a typical bus...but they would gather, hoping to grab a seat on the next yellow bus. The bus would arrive...about 50 people would clamor on and the bus would take off. The rest of the crowd would step back and mingle for another five minutes or so, before starting the process all over again.
At one point a man, who had evidentally just bought a bottle of water at the grocery story, came over to my little tree, opened his jug of water and dumped it out.
I guess he forgot his empty jug.
Finally, in the distance I saw a white Mercedes.
Hallelujah!
I walked toward him...and he rolled down his window?
'Taxi,' I shouted over the crowd.
'Da!'
Amen!
I climbed in...and sighed.
The driver laughed.
He turned the car around near the gathering throng of bus riders and we headed home.
I got home, checked my email and then got ready to head out again.
I had a three o'clock appointment to meet fellow adoptive parent Sue, her daughter Caroline and her two new daughters for a walking tour of downtown Odessa.
Our tour guide, Sonja did a great job of showing us the sights and giving us bits of interesting trivia.
For instance...
Did you know at one point the governor of Odessa sent the Russian Czar 3,000 oranges, with a message inside each one, asking for more money for the city's development? Yep...strange, but true. They even have a monument to commemorate it. We didn't get to see the orange orb. They just moved it.
We walked down to the pier...which is something I've wanted to do since we got here. We climbed down the Ptomkin (I know it's not the way it's spelled...somebody correct me) steps and walked through the park just above.
It was all so beautiful.
On our way back, we stopped by one of the downtown cathedrals. The really big one (again I can't remember the name) and Sue and the girls went on in. I decided not too. I didn't have anything to cover my head and didn't want to offend anyone.
They came back out and insisted I go back sometime...they say it's beautiful. On the other side of the steps a woman was selling some more of those flower arrangements, so this time I forked over five grivnas for a broom-like one.
And we finally heard the story.
Today was the celebration of the epiphany...the baptism of Christ by John the Baptist.
For orthodox believers today is all about the water.
On this day they believe water blessed by priests has supernatural properties.
The holy water can get rid of evil spirits and keep you safe. It can heal you and if you jump in the icy waters of a river or lake that has been blessed by the priest, it can purge you of your sin.
People take the holy water home to bless their homes...that's what the broom like flower arrangements are for. You take the arrangment, dip it in 'holy water' and sprinkle it around the house. It gets rid of all the bad stuff and then if you place the pretty flower arrangement in your house it will protect you and bring you good luck.
The water's goodness even temporarily extends to tap water.
A fellow adoptive parent was told the water was okay to drink between midnight and 4 a.m. this morning - she got up and had a glass of water.
I'm not that brave.
Around dusk, it was time to head home. Sue and her family had a dinner appointment, so I walked back to Mikky D's to grab some dinner, then went to the grocery store under the mall to pick up some supplies.
As I walked home I realized I was carrying my broom in one hand and a jug of water in the other.
If I didn't look like a local before, I am convinced I certainly do now! :)
------------------------
Pictures: After I arrived home, Nataliya called and offered to take me on a walking tour of the downtown area at night. She said I HAD to see everything all lit up. She was right. It was absolutely gorgeous! Here are some pics of my afternoon tour and our nighttime stroll.

lexus or lada

The visit with Maddie was typical today. That's the way it gets with this process...each day is the same as the day before.

Today we went outside. Due to taxi troubles, I didn't get there until after she was already dressed to go outside, so I decided to give it another try.

It didn't work.

There's too many distractions...and no opportunity to really get to know each other. She goes from one toy to another...and I tag along.

And there are too many opportunities for her to walk up to other adults looking for attention. I need to be the one she gets attention from.

There is one orphanage worker who Maddie loves...and that's great. She gives Maddie candy EVERY time she sees her. That's not great. The girl can not handle her sugar!

And then there are the strangers.

Maddie walked up to a woman and gave her a hug.

She wasn't an orphanage worker....she was just walking through the courtyard.

Sigh.

We have our work cut out for us.

Maddie also decided it would be fun to run away from me when I told her to 'come here.'

The good news...I know she knows the meaning of the phrase.

The bad news...She's showing me she is going to test me...alot. And there's not a whole lot I can do about it right now. UGH!

After visiting hours were over, I made my way home via taxi...again.

You know...the whole time I've been here I think I've only had the same driver once. I know the OES staff and the orphanage are calling the same taxi company...boy, they must have a lot of drivers.

The funny thing is...you never know what type of car you're going to get. It's a toss up. Will you get a 2007 Lexus or a 1979 Russian Lada?

I've decided to make a game of it. (I've got to do something for entertainment...it's just me, myself and I around here.) I make a bet with myself as to which type of car will show up each morning. I'm thinking about rewarding myself if I'm right...how does a Snickers sound? :)

And maybe I should keep track and post the stats here on the blog. It could say something to the effect of, 'When you call the XYZ taxi company in Odessa you are ???% likely to get a Russian Lada.'

Umm....

Perhaps I have too much time on my hands! :)

Don't worry...my prospects are brightening.

Guess what I got to do this afternoon?

Just guess...

I went to lunch with Nataliya!

Yep...I finally met my blogging buddy from New York State.

We went to a lovely sandwhich shop where I had a chicken wrap and fries and she had an awesome dessert-like dish. It was sooooo good. She let me have a few bites, and then she took me over to the grocery store so I knew what to look for, if I wanted to buy some for myself.

You KNOW I do!

Afterwards, Natalyia had to track down some more court decrees, so we said goodbye with a promise to try and get together again before she leaves.

So I headed back to the apartment to wait for the kid's call, do more laundry (there's always laundry) and read a book.

Tomorrow morning it's back out to the orphanage for another visit with Maddie.

So what do you think?

What kind of cab will it be?

A Lexus or a Lada?

day 7

Seven days down...three to go.
Not too bad.
It's gone pretty quickly.
In Ukraine, you have to wait 10 days for the court decree to take affect. It gives you time to bond with your child...and a chance for anyone who wants to, to contest the decision.
But once that wait is over...they're yours.
Only three more days until I'm officially a mommy of four.
Wow.
We've been pretty lucky with this part of the process...four days of our wait have come over the weekend...and the 10 days are up on a Sunday. So Monday we can immediately get to work on finishing up the paperwork.
The end is in sight.
I'm not sure what day I'll finally get custody of Maddie. Technically I should be able to get custody of her on Monday, but my facilitator is suggesting that we let her stay in the orphanage for a few more days while we run around and finish up the paperchase.
The mommy side of me wants to scream, 'NO!' I want my child out of there as quickly as possible.
But the reasonable side of me knows at this point Maddie doesn't know any differently. She's always been at the orphanage. In fact, taking her away from the only home she has ever known will be traumatic. Why add to the trauma by dragging her all of creation, trying to hunt down papers?
It's bad enough for me...I can't imagine subjecting a toddler to it.
So, she'll stay...but just until we get the paperwork done.
Then I'm springing her from that joint! :)
Today's visit went well. We stayed inside even though the other children went out. It worked out much better.
We were able to sit and read, eat and work on our vocabulary.
A French couple is also adopting from this orphange...their daughter is younger than Maddie. They stayed in too. It was a little crowded, but we got along just fine. They spoke a little English so we were able to talk about timelines and development. You know...typical international adoptive parent stuff. ;)
I had a great moment with Maddie today. While the other family was off playing a game, Maddie and I ate some raisins - actually, she ate the raisins, I fed them to her.
When she was done, she climbed up in my lap and I started rocking her. As we rocked, she snuggled in closer.
She was the most relaxed I have ever seen her...and she did a great job of making eye contact. What a wonderful gift. The first signs of true bonding.
Sigh.
All too soon the visit was over and I headed back to the apartment. I dropped off Maddie's backpack and grabbed my grocery list. It was time to go grocery shopping. I hadn't really done much shopping since Meshack left.
I needed...

• - milk
• - water
• - butter
• - bread
• - cheese
• - chicken
• - salt
• - pepper
• - potatoes
• - chocolate
• - crackers

I found everything but the crackers. I wasn't expecting to find saltines...just kind of hoping. I want to make some potato soup and crackers with butter sounds really good right now.
Finding the salt and pepper turned out to be a little more difficult than I expected. I didn't realize how many spices look like pepper. And the salt is not the finely ground stuff we're used to. But I finally figured it out.
I carried the groceries the five and a half blocks back to the apartment, stopping every so often to switch the bags around. I never realized just how heavy a 2 liter bottle of water could be! :)
I got 'home', put the groceries away, fixed lunch - scrambled eggs and cheese, changed into sweats and was just settling on the couch to read a book when I heard someone fumbling with my front door. I could hear them speaking Russian as they messed with it.
Finally, they knocked.
It was the cleaning crew.
Can I just say, 'I want one!'
I want a cleaning crew.
They came in and had my place sparkling in less than a hour.
Meshack...when I get home can I have a cleaning crew?!
Pleeeeeease????
After they left, all was quiet.
So quiet, I fell asleep.
I woke two hours later (boy, I must have been tired) and it was dark outside. Too late to go do anything, so I snuggled back under the covers and watched 'While You Were Sleeping.'
A pretty do-nothing kind of day.
But a good one.
And I'm one more day closer to springing Maddie! ;)

where to begin?

Okay...don't freak out. I don't want you freaking out.
Do you promise not to freak out?
Okay...
I was in a car accident this morning.
Really...it wasn't that big of a deal. And no...I wasn't driving! ;)
It was one of my crazy taxicab drivers...but the funny thing is...he wasn't a crazy taxicab driver. I was actually thinking at the time how nice it was not to have to worry about his driving. He was calm, collected, driving like a totally normal human being.
There was no zigging, no zagging...no driving up on curbs or darting around busses at high rates of speed. He stopped and started normally...
Maybe that was the problem.
Maybe in order to survive driving here you have to be a lunatic.
Anyway...
He felt horrible...about the car.
He didn't even ask if I was alright.
Sigh.
It's the same no matter where we live isn't it? The car is always their baby! ;)
I'm fine, really. Just a little sore. Nothing that some advil and sleep can't handle.
And the car was fine. I don't know what he was worried about.
He had rear-ended a van at a very low speed. Just ripped off the license plate and the holder. But you would have thought it was the end of his world. He got out of the car, made some huge gestures with his hand...although you could tell he knew it was his fault...and generally looked miserable.
When the other driver finally took off, he got back in the car, put the license plate on the passenger side floorboard and we were on our way.
I finally asked him if he was alright. He looked sadly in the rear view mirror, 'da....da.'
Hey!
He could understand English!
He's the first cab driver I've had that has had ANY inkling as to what I'm saying!
I was thrilled.
He pulled up in front of the orphanage and told me how much it was.
I gave him a tip...a pretty decent tip. I felt bad. He was going to have to replace the license plate holder.
He actually turned to me...smiled (yes, I know, shocker) and said, 'Good luck!'
That was nice...now I wonder if I should have given him more! :)
Maddie and I had a nice visit. Again, we were outside, which right now means by the time we are done, we are a muddy mess.
Both of us.
Quite honestly, I'm not sure the outside playtimes are doing much to help our bonding. We pretty much walk around holding hands until she find something she wants to do and then I watch her.
This is what our typical playtime is like. And it proves I was right when I told you she is the smartest girl in all Ukraine...and possibly Europe!
I had just told Maddie she couldn't sit on the bench because it was 'yucky'...and had wiped it with my hands to prove how dirty it was.
I turned my back for one minute and this is what she did...



Her scarf ended up a muddy mess...and so did her pants when she decided to ride a scooter that was too short for her. She ran through a mud puddle and the wheels scraped against the backs of her legs.
I am SURE the ladies were wondering what my kids look like at home.
And of course if your kid gets muddy...you get muddy.
It's too muddy to do much of anything...and since I'm not much of an outdoor playing kind of girl, that's Meshack's arena, I think tomorrow we'll stay inside.
I'll just bribe her with juice, a cookie or two and some raisins.
After our visit I went home and had just changed out of my muddy jeans and into some sweats for the evening when I got a call from the Haugs. They invited me to come with them to church tonight and said I could come early since I have the whole fear of the alleyway thing going on.
Sounds great to me.
I took a shower, put some fresh clothes on and headed over.
The Haug's weren't there...they were participating in more of the paperchase - the unending quest for proper papers here in Ukraine. But their friend...a missionary from Omaha and their new daughters were there to welcome me.
Michelle, the missionary, works with older children in the orphanage. She volunteers to teach them art and dance...and along the way she loves the kids. Something they are sorely needing.
We talked about her work and about our adoption and before we knew it, it was time to head to church.
What a blessing.
While the church is small, it was full of faith. Believers from all kinds of different walks of life were there. The pastor is from Sweden...his wife is Ukranian. He preaches in English and she translates.
Another Ukranian couple, Julia and Sergey, work with street kids in a program called Youth of Ukraine. Michelle and her roommate, Lisa were there - they volunteer at orphanages...and another woman from Ohio was staying with them, considering coming to Odessa as a missionary.
Wow.
When I was a child I was so impressed by missionaries. They are willing to leave everything that was comfortable to them and go into a foreign country to tell others about Christ.
As an adult, I'm humbled. These are ordinary people doing extraordinary work. Relying on God to give them what they 'need' not necessarily their wants. Putting their own personal ambitions aside...and answering the call.
After two hours of worship, prayer and praise it was time to go home.
I was a bit nervous...after all I had the scary alley to conquer...but I didn't need to be worried. Steve, Gail, Lisa and Betsy walked me home.
Five blocks out of their way.
I could have hugged them.
We sat (actually stood) in my apartment for awhile and chatted. It was so nice to hear something besides my own voice and CNN in this apartment. They oohed and aaahed appropriately over the pictures of all four of my beautiful children. We swapped stories about international flights and talked about the plight of these orphans.
And then they went home.
What started out kind of crummy day, ended up pretty nicely.
Let's see what tomorrow brings.

the field trip

I didn't get to visit Maddie today.
Not because I missed my cab or because anyone was sick, but because today is a religious holiday.
Unfortunately, no one told me.
I walked into the orphanage doctor's office at 10 this morning to check in and was greeted with confused looks. I tried asking (in my general pantamime way) for permission to go visit Maddie and they replied with way more than their usual 'da, da.'
So I tried asking questions...and they tried answering.
It wasn't working so I pulled out the cell and called Lev.
It seems in honor of the holiday the kids went to church and they wouldn't be back until the afternoon.
Sigh.
I wouldn't be able to see her unless I came back for the afternoon visit. The problem with that is, I just don't feel safe coming back at night by myself. As I've told you before, the alley I have to walk through is a little intimidating...even in the daylight...let alone in the complete darkness. There is very little light and several tunnels I have to walk through to get here.
I've actually considered asking the OES staff to find me an apartment back at the main building. It's not that I don't love my apartment - I do. It's just that at the other apartment complex, the courtyard is nice, well-lit and there's plenty of traffic at all hours. That way I could visit her twice a day...feel safe...and be around other adoptive parents.
I'm still thinking about it.
Anway...
There wasn't anything I could do but make the best of it. Since Maddie was on a field trip...maybe I should go on one too.
So I did.
I went for a walk...a long walk down by the Black Sea.
I have no idea what I saw, but I enjoyed exploring...and I finally feel like I'm starting to get a feel for Odessa's geography.
First I walked toward what I think is the opera house, then turned left, went a couple of blocks and turned right. (I'm great with directions aren't I?) This road took me past a woman begging with a tin cup, a couple of street cats sunning themselves in a stairwell and a street vendor selling bread.
I also passed high-end specialty shops selling everything from jewelry to souvenirs.
At one point I passed a bunch of men standing on a street corner, speaking in English. One of them said something about acting like the driver that day.
Aaaaah...it was good to hear English.
Then I came across a gaggle of German tourists. I'm pretty sure they were German. I took a semester of it in college and they sounded just like my college prof. Of course, I can't remember anything from that class except, 'Spreche se deutsch.'
Doesn't help me much - since I don't. ;)
I kept walking, enjoying the fresh air, taking in the sights and trying my best to read the Cyrillic business names. (I am getting better...it's like a game to me now! :)
I finally reached Primorskiy Blvd., and Moon Park. (I only know that because I found an online map to tell me what it was.) It was a great walking area with a ton of steps that take you down to a very busy street.
Silly me... I decided to walk down the stairs.
About half way down I realized I would have to climb back up.
Duh.
I kicked myself the rest of the way down.
I am not a stair climber.
When I got to the bottom I found a free venicular right next to the stairs.
Whew.
There is such a thing as a free ride. ;)
Once I got back to the top I walked from one end of the park to the other and then headed back.
I walked past the bread vendor, the sunning cats and dropped some coins in the old woman's cup. I walked past the stores selling jewelry and the ones selling souvenirs. I grabbed a bite to eat at McD's, walked through another park, headed over to the 'Greek Mall' and strolled through the grocery store before finally heading home.
I'd made it.
My first really big excursion on my own and I had explored the city and found my way home.
A successful field trip if I do say so myself.
Although my legs are killing me! :)

what day is it anyway?

I've reached the point where I'm having a hard time keeping track of what day it is.
It's kind of scary to admit...but I'm choosing to blame it on the fact that I went so long without any measureable amount of sleep...the time difference...and not going to church last Sunday.
It's certainly not because I'm losing my mind or anything.
I've resorted to checking the computer calendar to make sure of the day...although that can be deceiving as well, because the clock is still set on Central time.
Speaking of time..
I had a good visit with Maddie today, although it was a little short.
I think the regular OES office workers were out this morning, because my cab didn't get called. I finally called the office and the cab showed up five minutes later, but I had already lost valuable time. Since the orphanages operate on a strict schedule, a half an hour gone is a half an hour gone. There's no making it up.
By the time my cab pulled up the kids were heading outside for recess.
Maddie was thrilled to see me. I bundled her up in the obligatory layers, even though it was over 40 degrees. I kept thinking how nice it would be to just put her in a coat, gloves and boots (for the mud) and call it good. At least then the kid could move.
We were good though and bundled up and headed outside.
It was a muddy mess...which meant the kids ended up a muddy mess.
I'm so glad I don't have to do all of that laundry! :)
Before we knew it, it was time to go in and time for my visit to end. Again, Maddie had a difficult time letting go, although there were no tears this time. I promised to come again the next morning (although I'm sure she didn't understand) and made my way back down the stairs and over to the administrative building.
The ladies in the administrative building are really nice. They try so hard to be helpful...but sometimes it feels a little smothering.
Take this morning for instance.
They insisted I stay in the building to wait for the taxi....they pantemimed the driver would ring the bell when he arrived.That would be great, but I know from experience the driver NEVER ends up at the right address. There's another orphanage next door and they ALWAYS go to that gate instead.
Going against my better judgement, I sat down to wait. I figured they were just trying to be nice...letting me stay in the warm building (although it was so warm it would have been kind of nice to wait outside.)
Besides...maybe they knew something I didn't.
So I waited...
and waited...
and waited...
He didn't come.
Finally they called again.
He showed up about 45 minutes later.
What is with my luck with taxis today?!
Good news though...while I waited I found the phrase in my Russian book to ask for a cab. It's written in Russian cyrillic and English phonetic...so if my pronunciations don't work out I can show them the sentence in the book.
Also good news...I've established some sort of report with the administrative office workers and when I come in, they know what to do. They just smile, say something that ends in taxi...I say, 'da', and they make the call.
Whew.
By the time I got home I was famished...it had been a long time since my strawberry nutri-grain bar, so I fixed a PB&J and sat down at the computer to catch up on all my bloggie friends.
In my inbox was an email from some fellow bloggers who live only a few hours away from us at home, and are here in Odessa. They had the same SDA appointment date as us and have been here ever since.
You think we had it bad.
Their story is amazing.
Steve and Gail invited me over for dinner and I jumped at the opportunity. They are also staying at the OES...but at a different location. So I walked the four blocks to their apartment carrying a box of chocolate chip cookies as my offering for dessert after a dinner of spaghetti, salad, peas and french bread.
Mmmmmm....a home cooked meal.
Meshack and I had pretty much lived off of sandwiches and fruit. Most evenings we were too tired to make any real effort at supper.
It was nice to have a hot meal.
And it was nice to have great conversation too.
Steve, Gail, their facilitator and oldest adopted son were all there...the five of us squeezed around a table meant for four and shared adoption tales and talked politics and religion to our hearts content.
It was nice to have someone to talk to...I'm getting tired of the sound of my own voice.
Before I knew it, it was time to head home. I needed to get to sleep early so I could be ready for the phone calls from the kids in the middle of the night.
Steve and Gail said they'd give me a call and let me know about Wednesday church services at the local church they're attending.
I can't wait.

on my own

Isn't there a song by that name?

Who sang it anyway?

No, wait! Don't look it up! I've got time...I'll google it!

Sigh.

Today was my first day absolutely on my own and I have to say I did alright...except for one little trash throwing incident but let's not tell Meshack about that, shall we?

It'll just be our little secret. ;)

The day started out bright and early with a phone call to Meshack to find out how his train ride went. He said he did great...slept the whole night. So he's finally on Kiev time...just in time to head home. ;)

I hung up and got ready to visit Maddie.

I have a standing order in with the Odessa Exec. Suites to order me a taxi every morning so I can go visit Maddie at 10 a.m. They make the call...the taxi shows up at 9:30.

It's a pretty sweet deal. (sorry, I couldn't pass up the pun...again)

The biggest thing I have to worry about, is showing the taxi driver the little piece of paper with the orphanage's address on it and then making sure my strawberry nutri-grain bar stays where it's supposed to (if you know what I mean. ;))

Our visit this morning was a little rough. Maddie came running as always, but immediately started looking for Meshack. I tried explaining he went home (dom) or bye-bye (baka-baka or das vedanya) but she wasn't having any of it.

Sigh.

Yea, sweetie...I feel the same way.

I finally distracted her with a new coloring book and all was well in the world once again.

We didn't go outside today...the other kids did, but for some reason they didn't invite us. They just kept pointing back to the kids' playroom, so instead of rocking the boat, we stayed inside.

I think we would have been better doing a little rockin'.

Maddie has shown me a new side of her personality. One that wasn't entirely unexpected, but a new wrinkle non-the-less.

She is a pouty fit thrower.

She doesn't scream and cry (which is a blessing). She just drops to the floor and sticks out her bottom lip.

I've been tempted to laugh. If that's the best she can throw at me then she's in a heap of trouble. ;) But I know (a) it's probably not her best attempt and (b) laughing will only make it worse, so she had her first little bit of correction today.

Unfortunately it wasn't too effective because a caregiver walked in at that moment and my message was lost. I was trying a form of time-out and as soon as the woman came in she called Nastya over to her.

Sigh.

That's another of the frustrating parts of this process.

She's mine...and she's not.

I won't really feel comfortable in getting serious about discipline until we get home or at least until I get custody of her. Until then, I'm at the mercy of the caregivers.

After that little incident however, things went swimmingly. And here's where it gets good...

She cried when I left.

How sweet is that?!!!

Okay...I know it's a little mean of me. The idea of being happy that she's sad is a little twisted, but it's how international adoption works. You want them to be sad when you leave.

It means you're making a difference...an impression.

It's a start.

Coming home from the orphanage is always an experience.

First I have to find someone to call me a taxi. This is usually done with an extensive round of charades (Does anyone know how to say, 'Can you please call me a taxi?' in Russian?) followed by the wait.

This morning even the pantemiming didn't work.

The poor security lady didn't have a clue what I wanted.

After five minutes of wild gesturing and then staring at each other, obviously hoping to use our telepathic powers, I called Lev.

Five minutes later the cab pulled up.

Why don't I just do that every day?!

I came home,fixed macaroni and cheese for lunch (aren't you glad I'm including the details) and then headed out for a quick walk. I wanted to pick up some trash sacks and try to find a toy for Maddie.

The trash sacks were relatively easy.

I found a neat little store a block away that had a lot of English products, so it was easy to figure out what was what. I'm going back there.

Finding the toy was a different story.

I finally found a five story mall tucked inside a relatively obscure building near the Mikky-D's. The top floor was dedicated to kids stuff...I keep forgetting the malls here are organized by gender. I ended up traipsing through each and every level looking for anything kid related...all I came up with was a men's floor, a jewelry and makeup floor, a women's clothing floor and a floor with shoes.

Finally success.

The fifth floor was full of kids stuff...expensive kids stuff.

I bought her a sensory ball.

It's meant for toddlers, but I figure with the orphanage delay we can probably get some use out of it for at least the next two weeks (maybe longer).

Then I headed home. It was getting late and I don't like being in my alley at night. There are scary shadows out there. I pretty much lock myself in for the night at 4 p.m.

I got home just fine and decided I had better get the trash out before nightfall, so I gathered it up and headed across the street to throw it in the blue bins.

I had just tossed it into the bin when an older woman came up to me and started yelling loudly telling me something in Russian.

Is there some sort of trash removal protocol I'm not aware of? I evidentally insulted the woman somehow but honestly I don't know what I did.

Maybe I threw it in the wrong bin?

Sigh.

Who knows?

The only thing I know for sure is the next time I take the trash out it's going to be early in the morning before ANYONE is up! ;)

-------------------

Above: Maddie shows off her artwork on the Doodle Pro. Talented, isn't she? Me? No, I'm not biased...I just know a talented artist when I see one! ;)

it was the best of times...

...and the worst of times.
Never has that line been more appropriate than today.
Today I got to play with my little girl to my hearts content...
And I had to say goodbye to my best friend.
Sigh.
What an emotional day.
It started out great. Lev left last night to go back to Kiev to wait out the 10 days, so it was just Meshack and me.
Just the way we like it.
We left around 9:30 a.m. for the orphanage. It was the first of two visits with her. We are able to see her from 10 to 11:30 a.m. and then again from 4 to 6 p.m. We have to take taxis from the apartment to the orphanage because Lev doesn't know the bussing system.
I'm bound and determined to figure it out somehow.
Anyway...we ordered a taxi and made our way to whatever side of town the orphanage is located on. (I think it's the south, but honestly have no real idea...I'm all turned around here.) And we showed up 15 minutes early because our driver was a maniac. We were literally speeding up on corners.
WHO SPEEDS UP ON CORNERS?!!!
We survived...that's all that counts.
When we arrived Maddie was thrilled to see us. She was full of smiles, hugs and kisses again. The best thing are her kisses...they're the European kind. You know - a kiss on each cheek. Too cute! :)
Oh...and NEWS FLASH! - She has wrapped her daddy around her little finger. For those of you who know Meshack in real life this should come as no real surprise to you. All of his children have accomplished this feat within minutes of meeting him.
He's the best.
For today's excitement you once again have to use your imagination.
The room where we visit Maddie is a commons area between the two and three year old groupa rooms. It's a play room of sorts and an area where they store boots, coats, gloves, hats and anything else needed to go outside.
We were in the middle of our visit when suddenly we were attacked. Thirteen two year olds opened the door from their room and ran yelling into the room. They were headed outside to play!
I have to agree! - Woohoo!
The only problem is that Maddie wasn't too thrilled with all of these children interrupting her one-on-one time with her Mama and Papa.
Boy was she peeved.
She told them off in Russian like nobody's business. Q-ball, Punky and JacJac are going to have to watch they don't end up on her bad side.
One of the little boys kept trying to steel her crayons, another child sat on top of her coloring book, one boy was going through her backpack and another was touching her Papa's shoulder.
She didn't know which child to attack first.
So she yelled.
Loud.
It didn't help.
The kids were focused.
We tried helping the caretakers get coats, gloves, shoes and other stuff so they could clear out faster, but that meant poor Maddie had to fend these kids off herself.
All Meshack and I could do was laugh.
Maddie didn't find it so funny.
About the time the two year olds cleared out, the three year olds escaped from their room as well. They were headed outside too...this time we decided to go along.
The caretakers brought us a sweatshirt, coat, gloves, snowpants, extra socks, hat and gloves. It was 40 degrees yesterday. I don't know how she even moved.
So today's pictures are from our excursion outside with her groupa. (Just double click on the picture to open up a bigger slide show)



I have a new respect for the work these women do. I don't know how they keep track of all the kids and get even the basic things accomplished. It's no wonder the kids are so delayed...there's no way they can spend any quality time teaching these kids anything.
We went back in the afternoon for another, much more quiet visit. This time we brought raisins and apple juice. I know it's going to sound like I'm bragging, but I am convinced my youngest daughter is the smartest girl in all of Ukraine - if not Europe! ;) She learned the 'sign' for 'more' in about minute an a half. And I'm not talking about copying it here folks....she used it independently.
She's one smart cookie!
Of course food is a great motivator.
I think tomorrow we'll try Cheerios and some more apple juice.
Actually...I will.
That brings me back to the worst of times.
Meshack is on his way back to Kiev.
He left on the overnight train a little while ago. He wouldn't let me go to the train station with him - he didn't want me having to walk through the alley by myself at night. I can't say I disagreed with him. But watching him walk away from me with his suitcase and carryon was possibly the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Not because I can't do this by myself...but because I don't WANT to do this by myself.
I love coming back to the apartment in the evenings, curling up on the couch and talking about all of the great things Maddie did that day. I love sharing jokes in pig latin on the metro so no one else can understand, I love holding his hand as we walk down the street and working together to interpret the labels on packages in the grocery stores.
But as difficult as it is for me to have him leave...I know the kids at home need him more.
They've been without their parents for four out of the last six weeks. We are an incredibly tight family...we do everything together. Everything. So having us both gone for so long has not been easy on them.
They need their daddy.
So Meshack will get on a plane early Monday to head home. He will be there for basketball games, girl scout meetings and parent-teacher conferences. He will be there to fix their meals, play with them and tuck them in at night.
He'll be there to hold, hug and wipe away tears.
And he'll get ready for the new little one I'll be bringing home.
I just wish it was soon.

i love my apartment

I have quite possibly the coolest apartment in Odessa.

No, really, I do.

It's awesome! It has absolutely everything I need...

a king size bed...

high speed internet...

a water heater (no going without hot water! woohoo!)...

satellite TV...

a safe...

a dining room...

heated towel racks...

central air (great, if I were here in the summer! :)

a full sized refrigerator/freezer...

Oh, and did I mention the whirlpool tub?!!

Okay...I heard that collective, jealous gasp. Yep. I have a whirlpool tub - and I am putting it to good use. Everyone who adopts should have one of these things.

It's awesome!!!

The whole apartment is pretty sweet (hehe - pun fully intended.)
But it took a bit of finangling to get here. You knew there'd be a story didn't you? What else would you expect from us? ;)

Okay...going back to my blog about arriving in the city of Odessa without a place to stay. Not one of our finer moments I have to tell you. It ranks right up there with the time we went on vacation in Duluth, MN without making hotel reservations. Surely we could find a hotel somehwere around there.

Nope.

It was Grandma's Jazz Festival Weekend...there's nothing available for 30 miles around - except a seriously flea-bag hotel on the outskirts of town. They had one room...I'm not sure the last time it was cleaned...and we had to share the bathroom with a couple of other rooms.

Yea...you know how I feel about bathrooms.

We ended up going to Walmart and buying some sleeping bags to sleep in since we weren't convinced the sheets were that clean. We wouldn't have stayed there except it was freezing outside and there weren't any camping spots to be found either. We needed a roof over our heads, although about half way through I was thinking the roof of our car would have been just fine.

But I digress...

So I'm having flashbacks to Duluth 1995, as we pulled into Odessa, but Lev swears up and down that he has this covered. He saw a hotel close to the orphanage. He's sure it will be reasonable and within walking distance.

So he finds us a driver, negotiates a price and off we go.

We soon pull up in front of a very nice hotel...looks practically brand new. Sounds good to me. He runs in...and runs right back out. It cost $130 a night.

Gulp.

I hoped this wasn't a sign of things to come.

It was.

They had told us Odessa is one of the most expensive cities in Ukraine to adopt from.

They weren't kidding.

We spent the next two hours (remember we only had five hours before court - and we hadn't showered or gotten dressed yet.) driving around the area looking for a place to stay.

I kept telling Lev...'Remember...there's that place I emailed you about. I'd really like to check it out.'

And he kept putting me off. 'Oh, they're expensive. We're on a budget.'

So NOW he's worried about the budget! :)

Finally the driver takes us to a hotel that doesn't look too bad from the outside. He runs in and runs back out to say we're in...it's only $50 a night, with a breakfast included.

Alright...not too bad, I'll give it a try.

As soon as we opened the door to our room I told Meshack that night would be the last night we spent there. I guess in the big scheme of things it wasn't so bad...except that it was incredibly small. I can't imagine having an almost four year old running around that room. There was no place to run...literally. Our suitcases - as small as they were - took up the only walking space around the beds. There was a TV in the corner, but that was the only other piece of furniture other than the beds.

The showers were fine...but I couldn't see spending $50 a night for a tiny room, with no refrigerator or way to cook (I'd have to eat out every meal), not to mention no grocery stores anywhere. There was no way to wash clothes, no internet service for as far as the eye could see (there was nothing near this hotel)...and with Meshack leaving I felt like I needed to have things as simple as possible.

Thankfully, Meshack agreed.

So he went next door to Lev and broke the news.

Lev took it pretty well. He teased me the rest of the day about the rooms...but then ate crow later when he finally called Odessa Executive Suites.

Not only do we get this awesome apartment...but it's in the heart of downtown Odessa and we got it for only $20 more than the tiny hotel room.

A pretty good deal if you ask me.

Yes, my budget is hurting a little - but I'm saving on my food bill, internet bill and overall entertainment bill. Plus, I have clean clothes...

And a whirlpool bathtub.

What more could a girl ask for?

play date

After court we finally had the chance to go visit our little girl. I know I have already shown you most of the pics, but I thought you may like to see a few more. (See...I'm thinking of you! :)
The first visit went remarkably well.
When we opened the door to her playroom, her caretakers told her, 'Nastya, your mama and papa are here!' She looked up from her snack, jumped out of her seat and flew across the room and straight into our arms.
It was the best hug. ;)
We weren't sure what kind of welcome we were going to get...but obviously someone had been prepping her as to what was going on.
After tons of hugs and kisses, she settled right down and started to play with us. A huge improvement over three weeks ago when she was a wild, bundle of energy. This time she readily sat down with us to play with some of the toys we brought from home. Her favorite was a box of crayons her big sister, Punky, picked out for her. She just couldn't get enough of scribbling with the colorful wax. Good thinking Punk!
All too soon the hour was over and at first she wasn't too thrilled with the idea of going back to her groupa. Lev explained we would be back the next day which helped calm her a bit. We gave her tons more hugs and then she got up, walked back to the door to her room, turned and waved, walked through and shut the door.
Sigh.
'Just think, Maddie. It won't be too long and you won't have to do that anymore.'

court date

Honestly, after all of the craziness of the past few days, court was a breeze. We were in and out in less than an hour - much quicker than it had been for the other three kids.
The only snag was when Lev indicated it could end up being a rather informal hearing, held in her office instead of an actual courtroom. Instead she decided to go ahead and go through all of the formalities.
That was fine with us...no use in doing anything that could come back and bite us later.
We walked into the courtroom shortly after 11:30 - about a half an hour late.
They started by asking us to introduce ourselves and give a statement as to why we were adopting. The only other questions they asked where to find out if Meshack felt like he could support a family of six...and if I would have the time to devote to yet another child.
Then the inspector, orphanage lawyer and prosecutor made some statements. Lev didn't feel the need to translate every last word for us. He just gave us the idea of what was going on. Evidentally at one point the lawyer decided she wasn't fluent enough in Ukranian to continue and asked if she could continue her testimony in Russian.
Everyone giggled at the comment except the judge who solemnly said, 'Da' and the lawyer continued.
After they were done, the judge asked us again if we indeed wanted to continue with our petition. We said, 'Da'. She stood up, and together with the two witnesses left the room.
They came back 10 minutes later and declared us Nastya's parents...and changed her name.
That was it.
Quick. Easy. Flawless.
The only part of this process to be so.
Now it was time to go eat lunch...and then we could visit our new daughter.
Boy that sounds good! :)

it's a girl!!!!

A 25 pound...3 foot long...brown-haired (yes, it's brown...for those of you who saw the facilitator photos, I double checked, it's definitely brown), brown-eyed beauty.
Okay...so I'm not too sure about the measurements...never mind that!
Isn't she precious?!!!
Maddie was officially added to our family at 12:34 p.m. today! :)
Now, I'm going to bed.
It's almost midnight here and I think I have finally kicked this jet-lag thing because I'm starting to get tired at the right time.
I'll fill you in on court tomorrow.
Enjoy the pics! :)

invasion of odessa

Have I mentioned we haven’t had a whole lot of sleep lately?
Um…yea.
We’re kind of sleep deprived...and at this point, it’s not too pretty.
After our Wednesday afternoon nap, Lev called with the plan.
He wanted us to call a cab and meet him at the train station at 9:30 p.m. We were taking the overnight train to Odessa.
My moment of truth had come.
I was finally going to be riding the train - long distance.
I immediately started limiting water intake.
Anything to avoid the 'facilities.'
What can I say? Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Lev said to have the driver show up at 8 p.m….just in case the bridge across the D'nipro was congested. Bogdan thought it was a little early, but he called the cab for us anyway. Bogdan was right.
The driver had us to the depot by 8:15.
We had over an hour and a half to wait.
And it was cold.
We started out waiting in the big lobby by the Christmas (or New Year’s) tree…but it was freezing in there. Don’t they heat that place? So we moved into the ticketing area and stood by the wall to wait.
Now, without a whole lot to do, we didn't have many options for entertainment. We'd already spent the last 48 hours with each other...and three of the five weeks before that.
We've talked about everything we could talk about.
So we people watched.
One babushka slumped over on the bench while taking a nap. I was worried she would fall off...no one else seemed to mind.
A security guard escorted a couple of homeless men out of the heated room and back out into the cold. I don't know if there are homeless shelters in Kiev (I doubt it), but if they don't I don't know how these people survive the winter.
And another group of men huddled together, tipping back bottles of liquor, laughing loudly and cracking jokes.
Everyone else just pretty much sat motionless, staring off into space…not making eye contact or smiling at anyone at all.
Sigh.
We also had enough time for Meshack and I to make last minute trips across the street to Mikky-Ds. For those of you about to travel - it's the only place for miles around with a decent bathroom, but in order to use the facilities, you have to buy something so you can get a code to open the door.
We bought a bottle of water.
I only took tiny sips.
I wasn’t taking any chances.
Finally, Lev showed up and led us to the train.
It wasn’t bad, honestly. The cabin was fine. We bought all four bunks so we would have the place to ourselves. The three of us set up our bunks, then sat back and chewed the fat for awhile. (I wonder if Lev knows that expression.) Then Lev filled us in on what the process would look like in the next couple of days.
About 11 o'clock he climbed in the top bunk and urged us to get some sleep.
Yea…right.
It was the middle of the day back home. How in the world were we going to sleep? That’s the thing about jet lag…it doesn’t care if you’re sleep deprived or not…you just can’t sleep when you’re supposed to.
I didn’t sleep a wink…the whole way there.
I watched a movie on the laptop, watched the darkness go by out the window, listened to Meshack’s MP3 player for three hours and spent some good quality time looking at the bottom of the bunk above me.
I thought about pulling my one and only book out of the suitcase, but I didn’t want to read another book and have absolutely nothing left to occupy my time for the next three weeks.
I was stuck.
About an hour before we were scheduled to arrive, the conductor went through and turned on all the lights...waking everyone up.
The line to the bathroom was loooong.
I wasn't in it! :)
An hour later we pulled in Odessa.
Now in order to fully appreciate this next part you have to use your imagination...or maybe pull up a audio file with sound effects.
I promise it's worth it.
The train came to a stop, but true to Lev form, we took our time.
We were the absolute last people off the train.
Not only that...we were the last people to disembark from the next to last car on the train.
Everyone was way ahead of us.
Remember that...NO ONE ELSE WAS AROUND.
Lev got off first, then me and then Meshack handed the luggage down to Lev.
We brought two roll-along suitcases with us (I'm so proud of ourselves). I grabbed the smaller of the two and Meshack grabbed the handle of the larger one. And we took off.
Now remember NO ONE ELSE WAS AROUND.
To paint the picture - the platform in Odessa is brick lined...it's really pretty. And the workers had done a great job of clearing the snow off to make it nice and safe for us. Two trains also share the same platform, so we were walking in between them, which means there was a lot of echoing.
I think you know where I'm going with this.
'Whop, whop, whop, whop, whop, whop, whop...'
I'm telling you it sounded like a squadron of Black Hawk helicopters were flying low overhead. All we needed were the sounds of bombs and machine gun fire.
It was so embarassing.
And the worst part was, and I hate to admit this...
In my jet-lag induced fog it took me a while to figure out what was really going on. I kept looking up, expecting to see something...anything.
Finally, people started staring...and it dawned on me.
Sigh.
Yep...that's us. The crazy Americans are invading Odessa...with two suitcases, four carryons, a teddy bear and an etch-a-sketch.
Sigh.
I needed some sleep.
Unfortunately the adventure doesn't end there. I would end this post on the line above...because it's such a great tag, but I have to get to the court hearing before you all reach through your computers and start choking me...and we have so much to tell BEFORE court even begins.
So here we go....
Remember the point I made about having only three hours to get ready for court.
Well, it turns out that wasn't quite right. Lev isn't great at estimating time...we actually had five hours. The problem was, he hadn't reserved any hotel space before we got here, so we drove around for two of our five hours looking for some place to stay.
We ended up at a flea-bag older hotel with two twin beds jammed in a bedroom the size of a small office, no food, no drinking water (just when I was actually allowing myself to drink :), no internet connections...nothing but a hot shower.
I'll take that hot shower...but you can keep the room. (More in a later post)
So we ended up with only three hours after all.
And not even three hours, because we had to run some errands before court.
Our main stop was the orphanage. It seems the director was 'disappointed' with the amount of our 'donation' and to keep everything pleasant, our faciliator told her he would ask us to up the amount of our donation.
Before court.
$300 more.
Thankfully my Sunday School class, in the kindness of their hearts, had collected an offering for the orphanage, but it was going to be a surprise donation...one where I could take pictures of all the things we bought so they could see how they had helped.
I'm sorry to say there will be no pictures.
We went by her office to drop it off. Lev walked into the office, shut the door, then five minutes later called us inside.
She had another request. It seems that overnight one of the computers died and needed to be replaced.
Uhhh Hmmmmm....
We told her the truth.
'We're sorry...but this adoption is costing us an arm and a leg...not to mention lots of money. If we have any left over when we're done, we'll send you some. But I wouldn't hold your breath.'
Okay...we didn't add the last sentence.
She seemed alright with that. Thankfully. She really is a nice lady. I'm sure she was just trying to do her job.
Sigh.
Finally, it was time to go to court.

rise and shine

We were up bright and early Wednesday morning…
Bright – as in 2 a.m.
Both of us are having a hard time with the time change this time around.
I brought some Melatonin with us on this trip, but can’t find it. So we’re struggling with getting sleepy in the middle of the afternoon and being so tired that we can’t help but take an afternoon siesta, falling asleep again around 7 p.m. and then waking up in the middle of the night.
After reading a whole book (one of only two I brought with me this time.), I finally fell back asleep around 5 a.m. only to be woken up again by the alarm at 8 a.m.
We needed to get down to the U.S. embassy as early as possible to get Meshack’s paperwork taken care of. He won’t have time to go to the embassy before his plane leaves on Monday morning, so we HAD to get it done today.
It was as easy as pie.
Well…if you’re baking it in a Ukranian stove with no directions.
Lev called right away with the U.S. embassy phone number and told Meshack to give them a call and set up an appointment.
So we called.
They said to come down anytime before noon…but the earlier the better. Who knows how long the lines would be.
We called Lev back with the news.
I don’t think he’s a morning person.
Anyway…he instructed us to take the Metro (by ourselves) eleven stops…and he would meet us there at 10 a.m.
This was a recipe for disaster.
He gave us the name of the stop…but you know how it is. It’s a different alphabet…all Ukranian sounds the same to us right now and we’re so sleep deprived, who knows if we can count to five let alone eleven!
Thankfully we had our handy-dandy map.
Cue the Dora the Explorer music, please.
(I’m the map, I’m the map, I’m the map, I’m the maaaaap.)
We found this awesome map at TGI Friday’s on our trip in December. Anyone traveling to Kiev needs to pick this thing up! It is written in English, has all the major (and minor) streets on it (including markers for the embassy and touristy type stuff)….and a complete map of the metro.
Hallelujah!
The only problem was, Meshack couldn’t remember exactly which stop Lev had said to stop at (remember…sleep deprivation).
He knew it started with an L and was eleven stops away, but there were two stops with an L in a row…and one was 9 stops and the other 10 stops. Were we supposed to count our starting point, which stop was it? We were so confused.
So we got on the bus, made our way down the Metro and started praying…and counting.
We eventually decided to stop at the first one…that way if we had made a mistake it would only be one more stop that we would have to go, instead of turning back around.
Good idea - kudos to us!
And then we realized we didn't know for sure where Lev said he would meet us. Was it upstairs by the entrance or did he say the platform. What did he mean by platform? Was he using it the same way we would? You just never know!
UGH – sleep deprivation is awful! It makes normally intelligent people, blithering idiots!
Finally, something kicked in. I don’t know if it was the Hershey’s kisses I brought with me or the Coca-Cola light Meshack drank, but we finally decided to call him on our cell.
Duh.
But before we could dial, Lev showed up.
We had picked the right stop and the right place to wait.
Wow. What dumb luck…especially since we had just remembered that we hadn’t bought any minutes for our phone!
Sigh.
Thankfully, the visit at the embassy didn’t require a whole lot of brain cells. All we had to do was fill out a couple of forms, raise our right hands to swear to something and sign our names.
No big deal.
We were in and out in 20 minutes.
It was so nice to have something go smoothly.
And we were treated nicely…smiled at…even wished good luck by the embassy worker. Not everyone was friendly though. I don’t think the Ukranians who were in the waiting room were too thrilled with us. They looked like they had been waiting awhile and kept shooting us dirty looks.
Oh well.
We walked back through security and off American soil.
Back into Ukraine.
Lev took us back to the Metro station, asked us if we could find our way home, mentioned something about picking up another paper from the SDA and said we would be taking the train that night to Odessa. He would give us a call with the details.
We rode the Metro back 10 stops…or was it 11 and made a quick pit stop at McDonalds. And who do we run into there, but a bunch of Americans?!!!
Is it our day or what?!
And they were from Missouri!!!
Can you beat that?
We travel half-way around the world and bump into some virtual neighbors.
We had a great talk with them.
They were students from Missouri State’s chapter of Baptist Students Union (I think). They were on a mission trip and were staying with the couple who pastored the church we visited while we were here in December.
They had arrived a couple of days after we left and were going to be leaving later this week.
Wow.
We literally traveled half way around the world, bumped into some virtual neighbors from Missouri, who are the same denomination as us and are staying with the missionaries we met on our last trip.
Weird, huh?
Actually, I’m thinking it may have been a God-thing.
Maybe it was his way of showing us just how He is in all the little details.
He brought these two groups of people to a McDonald’s at exactly the same point in time and had them sit in the same part of the restaurant and start their meal at almost the same time.
Why?
I don’t know…maybe just for encouragement.
The students were thrilled to be talking to someone who spoke fluent English. And while we haven’t been here that long, I have to admit it was nice to see some friendly faces.
And we got some more prayer partners out of the deal.
What a blessing.
A few hours ago, they didn’t even know us and now these kids will be lifting up these middle-aged strangers before the Father.
We have so many people praying for us on this trip – he’s going to get sick of hearing about us.
Yea…probably not. ;)
He is thrilled when we pray for one another…even if we don’t know them, just heard about them, or met them in a McDonald’s on the outskirts of Kiev. Kind of like the thrill I get when one of my kids prays for another to feel better.
Cool to think of, huh?
Our Daddy is pleased.
What a day.
It was exhausting.
We told our new friends, ‘das vedanya’, rode the bus the last few blocks, climbed the stairs to our apartment and promptly fell asleep! ;)

updates coming

I finally have internet access...
And it's DSL!
Can somebody give me a WOOHOO?!!!
I'm working tonight on posting all of the blogs I've been writing for the last several days - doing some tweaking and spell checking so keep checking back.
There are tons of posts coming.
And don't cheat! Start with Wednesday...

flat, sweet flat

We're here.
Finally.
Boy, it takes a loooooong time to fly to Ukraine.
And it wasn't without it's hitches.
We started out early yesterday morning by arriving at the airport late.
Really late.
We barely had enough time to check the luggage, go through security and get straight in line to board.
Nothing like waiting until the last minute.
It was par for the course yesterday...we cut it close for every single flight.
But what we lacked in timing we more than made up for in entertainment. I think we had the most unique fellow fliers in the history of our adoption trips.
From Kansas City to Atlanta I sat between two women who had experience with adoption. The one on my right had adopted two boys, who are now full grown. The one on my left was adopted as a baby. It was great getting their perspectives...and it helped pass the time.
Meanwhile Meshack was a few rows back with a couple of guys who didn't speak a word. I think he liked it that way. He was able to catch up on some of his sleep.
When we arrived at Atlanta we had 45 minutes to find our gate...not nearly long enough. We had to rush…and I mean rush…to catch our flight.
And we both neeeeeeded to go to the little boys and girls room.
No time.
We arrived at the gate to find them in the middle of the boarding process. Great…we had made it, but UGH there was no way we were going have time to use the facilities.
Melissa and Steve must have thought we were a little off. We were so caught up in our need to find a lavatory, we had forgotten our blogging buddies were on the same flight to JFK. They met us at the gate and all we had time to do was to give each other a quick hello and onto the plane we went.
From Atlanta to JFK I sat next to Meshack...you know about him. ;)
When we arrived in JFK we met up with Melissa and Steve and headed off to make our connection to Kiev. Thankfully, this time we had over three hours to wait, so we stopped off at Burger King for one last American meal and some great conversation.
We talked and talked and talked.
I don’t think there was any lull in the conversation. While we had never met in person, it was like meeting up with old friends.
We finally looked at our watched and decided it was time to catch our flight.
The gate was further away than we thought.
We made it to the gate with seconds to spare. ;)
We got on board and make our way to our seats...27 C and D...middle seats.
In 27 E was an older man on his way to Ukraine to meet a female friend.
He's never met her before.
I think it's one of those international dating things.
Not sure...but sure seemed that way.
And the best part...he was a talker.
So for the first two or three hours we were entertained - even though all we wanted to do was sleep. He told us how he was from Norfolk, Virginia and was on his way to meet his 'friend.' She was a concert pianist, vocalist and was a professor at a local university.
He was supposed to leave the day before but had missed his flight. So the airline had put him up for the night, gave him some free meal tickets and a free drink for the plane.
Yep. I know everything about him now...
except his name.
I don't think he ever told me.
I did help him fill out his passport control form...but I forgot to check his name.
We finally touched down around 9:30 this morning 40 minutes early (we had a doozy of a tail wind)...and Bogdan was there to pick us up.
I don't think I've told you about him yet. He was supposed to be my first profile installment...before the court date notice.
You really need to meet him.
Anyway...it was so nice to see a friendly face.
He immediately brought us back to the flat we called home for three weeks in December.
Sigh.
It's good to be 'home.'
Only one problem.
We're not supposed to be here.
The plan was to run around today doing paperwork and then to head to Odessa tonight. Now it's all been pushed off until tomorrow and we won't be able to get on the train until 10 p.m. tomorrow night...which means we get into Odessa around 8 a.m. Thursday.
Court is at 11 a.m. Thursday.
It sounds like one of Q-ball's math story problems...

• Two American's leave the Kiev train station at 10 p.m on an adoption trip to Odessa. The couple rides in a private berth on a train traveling 60 miles an hour, stopping every 10 minutes to pick up some more travelers, and they arrive at their destination at 8 a.m. How many hours will it take for them to look presentable for court?

Can't figure it out?
Let me give you a hint.
The answer is NOT three hours!!
They expect us to ride a train for 10 hours and then have to go to court three hours later? And we won't even have time to visit Maddie?!
I'm back in Ukraine.
There’s no point in planning anything…it’s just going to go right out the window.
I have to remember that.
I'm in Ukraine.
I'm in Ukraine.
I'm in.....

t minus 17 hours...again

Here we are again, on the eve of leaving for Ukraine...

This time will be so different...

Thankfully.

We won't be waiting for an SDA appointment.

We don't have the uncertainty of not knowing who our child is.

And hopefully this time it won't take as long.

Hopefully.

What is not different this time is the laundry list of things that still need to be done.

• - Laundry
• - Packing
• - Cleaning

And, thanks to mother nature...raking.

See what the recent warm-up left us in our front yard?

Hidden remnants of December's ice storm.

All of this was hidden under a foot of snow for the last two weeks.

We figured it would be bad.

We didn't think it would be this bad.

It would have been worse if it wouldn't have been for our wonderful church family. I have to blog about them someday - probably during the 10-day wait when every day is the same as the day before.

You have to get to know these wonderful people.

In the meantime...

Meshack and Q-ball have their work cut out for them today.

So do I.

I have to finish packing.

There are 17 hours left and I'm still not much further along than I was last night...although the house is looking better.

The girl who is staying with the kids while we're gone came by this afternoon for instructions...I had no choice...I had to get the placed cleaned up.

Now I have no choice...I have to pack.

I doubt I'll post before we leave tomorrow morning...there's just too much to do.

That..and we have to leave at oh-dark-thirty, to make our 8:20 a.m. flight.

Sigh.

That's early.

Oh well. The sooner we get there, the sooner we can get to our little girl and the sooner we can bring her home.

basketball, girl scouts and purell

Busy..busy..busy...
Today it's all about the little things.
Basketball...
Girl scouts...
and Pure!l.
Q-ball has a basketball game today...the first in a long line that I'm going to miss while I'm in Ukraine. Thankfully, some other moms have offered to take him to practice and games for us. And Meshack will be home next Monday and should be able to catch at least a couple of them.
Then there's Punky Girl Scout meeting today. It's a makeup meeting from the ice storm. The problem is her meeting starts a half an hour after Q-ball's basketball game begins.
And they're in two separate towns.
UGH.
I know, I know...it's only going to get worse the older the kids get.
Sigh.
Last but not least is the run to Wa!-Mart. I have a list a mile long and it includes two HUGE bottles of Purel! (or the generic equivalent). We received an email from Lev the other day filling us in on the details of the final part of our journey and he included one small request...

• After the court session we will have to wait for 10 calendar days for the court decree to come into effect. After that we will proceed with getting new birth certificate for the girl to get this done we will have to go to her birth town which is 70 kilometers away from Odessa. It may take one business day.
• After that we will have to get the new birth certificate certified, it is done in Odessa, usually in takes a couple of hours. After that we will have to go to notary to get some documents notarized, this may take from 30 minutes to several hours depending on how much a notary is busy. After that we will have to go to tax inspection to get the girl’s name changed on her tax ID code. It may take several hours to a day or two depending on whether they keep their database in order or not (I mean tax inspection’s database).
• The next day after getting the girl’s name changed on her tax ID code, we will be able to apply for her foreign passport. It may take from 3-5 business days to get foreign passport. After getting the passport we will go to Kiev to expose child to medical examination for visa. After that we will be able to proceed with the US Embassy. Usually it takes 2-3 business days to get physical done and get visa.
  I will be doing my utmost to complete your adoption process as fast as possible.
  Best regards,
  Lev.
  
  P.S. Could you, please, buy me two big bottles of hand sanitizer (‘Purel’ or something like that). They do not sell it here. At least I have never seen it here in Ukraine. Thank you in advance.

So I have to find a way to lug two big bottles of hand sanitizer to Ukraine in my luggage. And I am bound and determined not to take more than one small and one medium sized suitcase. I don't care if I have to wear the same outfits three days in a row (okay...who am I kidding...I care.) I'm not going to bring a bunch of junk with me this time.
I'm not.
Except for two big bottles of Purel!.

'press zero for the operator'

UGH.

Can I just say...

UGH.

The lack of customer service is enough to make you sick.

And I'm not talking about Ukraine...

I'm talking about the good old U.S. of A.

The heart of capitalism.

The same country who dreamed up the the slogan, 'Have it your way.'

UGH.

Meshack and I spent over 50 minutes on hold last night with D!recTV...

At the 20 minute mark, Meshack hit his limit and handed me the phone.

So I waited...

and waited...

and waited...

and WAITED!!!!

All I wanted them to do was to cancel our subscription to their sports package.

It's an extra $12 a month and we never watch it.

I just wanted them to take $12 off my bill.

And I couldn't even get them to pick up!

UGH.

At the 25 minute mark I reached the point...

You know...the one where you've hung on for so long that you don't dare hang up for fear you're the next one in the long line of unsatisfied customers.

'If I hang up now, I'll have to start over and wait forever...again.'

So I set the phone on the highest volume and laid it on the desk while I typed up this blog.

Even sitting a foot away from my ear, the classical music interrupted every thirty seconds by the message - 'Please hold on the line for the next available representative' grated on my nerves.

And I'm tellin' ya if I hear the 'I love the way you move,' jingle one more time I'm going to hurl!

UGH.

I finally got sick of it and got on their website to send D!recTV's customer service department a little note on my thoughts about their customer service. All the while the perky little girl kept urging me to hold for the next available customer service representative.

Yea, right.

Guess what kind of a reply I got when I hit the 'sent' button?

Go ahead and guess.

'Our goal is to reply within 48 hours. However, we are currently receiving an unusually high volume of e-mail, which may delay our response to you.'

Ya think?!

Click.

You know what the worst part of this is?

I work for a newspaper that owns a cable company...with great customer service.

If I just lived in the same town I work in, I could have every single channel out there for half of what I'm paying for expanded basic right now.

Including the movie channels.

And I wouldn't have to be on hold FOREVER.

UGH.

I'm choosing to look at the bright side in all of this.

At least when I return to Ukraine I'll be prepared for the cruddy customer service.

order out of chaos

Some semblance of order is starting to emerge out of the chaos that is our home.

To be honest, the last minute court date had us scrambling.

We had hoped to put off the court date for a week, but when I finally talked to our agency on Monday morning they told us that if we didn't do it now, (a) it wouldn't look good for us and (b) court could be put off indefinitely.

Nothing like having no choice but to move forward to kick your hiney into gear - is there?

Thankfully, we are starting to come out of the other side of this stressed-induced fog and are slowly but surely getting things checked off the 'To Do' list.

- The airline tickets are reserved.

- We have a babysitter.

- And the jobs have been notified.

Now we just having to come up with the financing.

Sigh.

It will come.

In the meantime, instead of a day of football, food and fun, we've had a day of laundry, cleaning and last minute chores.

It really wasn't so bad. We did have moments of fun in there...it's just that it definitely wasn't our typical New Year's Day, but then of course, there's nothing typical in this family right now.

Instead of watching football, taking naps and eating way too much food, we pulled clothes out of storage (I certainly hope she's really a 4T as the measurements indicate).

We set up a toddler bed (because we don't have time to go shopping for her 'big girl bed'...we'll wait for her birthday in February), we watched a bit of the outdoor NHL hockey game (don't ask me why - we're not huge hockey fans), Meshack and the kids did some sledding in the backyard for comic relief (I wish I had the camcorder charged.)

And I ate too much chocolate.

It's good for my nerves.

Purely medicinal in nature I assure you! ;)